Forums · My Thrown Together Team Stars in: Holy Jeepers!
Featuring Gallade as the lovable Roids Freak
I was out and about on the Shoddy playground, using a team I knew very little about, save one. I was about to become much better acquainted with them soon enough.
Rules: Ladder Match, Sleep Clause, Freeze Clause, OHKO Clause, Evasion Clause, Species Clause, Strict Damage Clause
gamer_reloaded sent out Gallade (lvl 100 Gallade ?).
SaintSeiya sent out Not Standerd loom (lvl 100 Breloom ?).
gamer_reloaded: hi
SaintSeiya: sup
SaintSeiya switched in Damned Turtle (lvl 100 Torkoal ?).
Gallade used Taunt.
Damned Turtle fell for the taunt!
--
Knowing these were only practice, we exchanged friendly greetings as we let our pokemon out of their pokeballs. Breloom emerged from his, my huge Gallade from mine. He looked husky, but those were just his rippling muscles he built up from kicking so much ass. Of course, my opponent doesn't know that...
Gallade used Bulk Up.
Gallade's attack was raised.
Gallade's defence was raised.
Damned Turtle used Earthquake.
Gallade lost 16% of its health.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Fearing an Ice Punch, my opponent savvily retreats to his smokey turtle. Gallade proudly shows my opponent his bulging triceps, and laughs at its attemps to shake the ground. Impressive, eh? ;)
Gallade used Bulk Up.
Gallade's attack was raised.
Gallade's defence was raised.
Damned Turtle used Explosion.
Gallade lost 57% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Damned Turtle fainted.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Suddenly and without warning, my opponent's Torkoal just went off, surely out of the shame it felt from not being as dripping wet with awesome as Gallade. Gallade didn't seem to notice much, though. He just kept on posing, showing off his pecs to bystanders and passer-bys. Dammit Gallade! Now is NOT the time for that! Or, is it?
me 6 - 5
SaintSeiya switched in A Fukin Cat (lvl 100 Luxray ?).
A Fukin Cat's intimidate cut Gallade's attack!
gamer_reloaded: goddamn
Gallade used Drain Punch.
A Fukin Cat lost 47% of its health.
Gallade absorbed health!
Gallade restored 21% of its health.
A Fukin Cat used Crunch.
Gallade lost 15% of its health.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Finally, Gallade began paying attention to the battle, and not his physique in the mirror that appeared out of nowhere for no reason, and attacked using his sharp elbows. Then he used his opponent's blood to make himself a protein shake using a blender he pulled out of his pocket. I reminded myself to cancel Gallade's credit card.
SaintSeiya switched in Cyclops (lvl 100 Dusknoir ?).
Cyclops is exerting its pressure!
Gallade used Bulk Up.
Gallade's attack was raised.
Gallade's defence was raised.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Gallade started flexing again, as my opponent tried to find a way to deal with him. Look at those lateral obliques....
Gallade used Taunt.
Cyclops fell for the taunt!
Cyclops used Will-o-wisp.
Cyclops can't use Will-o-wisp after the taunt!
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Gallade stopped kissing his biceps long enough to notice the Duskclops now before him. Rather than go back in his pokeball like I told him, he made fun of its whipped cream hair, and called him a 'fattie'. Apparently it hit a nerve--maybe some unresolved childhood issues--Dusclops didn't even finish its attack....it just stood there and started crying, while Gallade mocked him. Gallade! Don't be an asshole...
Gallade used Psycho Cut.
Cyclops lost 55% of its health.
Cyclops used Night Shade.
Gallade lost 30% of its health.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
Cyclops's leftovers restored its health a little!
Cyclops restored 6% of its health.
--
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It's super effective!
A critical hit!
Gallade lost 41% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Gallade fainted.
Cyclops's taunt wore off!
Cyclops's leftovers restored its health a little!
Cyclops restored 6% of its health.
--
Finally Gallade stopped messing around and started to battle. He does well, using his finely toned muscles to inflict great damage. Dusclops, however, seemed determined to stand up to his bully, and sent his shadow behind Gallade, and it tapped him on the shoulder. As Gallade turned around to see who it was, Dusclops ran up and kicked him in his steroid-shrunken poke-balls! Gallade went down after that; understandably. Maybe now he'll learn not to be such a prick...
Tie 5 - 5
Oh well. Serves him right. Now who's up next?
gamer_reloaded switched in Deoxys-E (lvl 100 Deoxys-e).
Deoxys-E is exerting its pressure!
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It's super effective!
Deoxys-E lost 32% of its health.
Deoxys-E used Knock Off.
It's super effective!
Cyclops lost 8% of its health.
Deoxys-E knocked off foe Cyclops's Leftovers!
--
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It's super effective!
A critical hit!
Deoxys-E lost 63% of its health.
Deoxys-E used Toxic.
Cyclops was badly poisoned!
Cyclops is hurt by poison!
Cyclops lost 6% of its health.
--
Having to put up with Gallade's antics made me lose concentration, and Deoxys gets battered a bit needlessly as a result. It seems Dusclops has some anger management problems.... it's still sobbing softly, flailing at Deoxys wildly. Time to change that.
gamer_reloaded switched in Porygon Z (lvl 100 Porygonz).
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It doesn't affect Porygon Z...
Cyclops is hurt by poison!
Cyclops lost 12% of its health.
--
Porygon Z used Dark Pulse.
It's super effective!
Cyclops lost 31% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Cyclops fainted.
--
Heh. Don't know why I didn't do that sooner. Oh well. I prepared to see what my opponent would do next.
me 5 - 4
SaintSeiya switched in God Of Thunder Bitch (lvl 100 Raikou).
God Of Thunder Bitch is exerting its pressure!
gamer_reloaded switched in Electivire (lvl 100 Electivire ?).
God Of Thunder Bitch used Thunderbolt.
Electivire's Motor Drive increased its speed!
--
I may not know much about the pokemon I'm using, but I knew one thing. That Raikou was going to shove a Thunderbolt up Porygon's ass if I didn't do something. So I sent in Electivire, who enjoys that sort of thing. Electivire now has a jolly spring in his step. Hopefully he'll battle better than Gallade did...
Electivire used Taunt.
God Of Thunder Bitch fell for the taunt!
God Of Thunder Bitch used Extrasensory.
Electivire lost 48% of its health.
God Of Thunder Bitch lost 10% of its health.
--
...instead, I witness the product of the friendship between Gallade and Electivire. Apparently, a mutual hatred of skinny, flabby bodies is what keeps the two meatheads together. Raikou is made of sterner stuff than his teammate, though, and Electivire quickly re-focuses on the battle.
Electivire used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
God Of Thunder Bitch lost 90% of its health.
SaintSeiya's God Of Thunder Bitch fainted.
Electivire lost 10% of its health.
--
...'Vire quickly finishes off his foe, gloating in his insufferable macho idiom. I have got to keep those two apart...
me 5 - 3
SaintSeiya switched in A Fukin Cat (lvl 100 Luxray ?).
A Fukin Cat's intimidate cut Electivire's attack!
SaintSeiya switched in Not Standerd loom (lvl 100 Breloom ?).
Electivire used Earthquake.
It's not very effective...
Not Standerd loom lost 26% of its health.
Electivire lost 10% of its health.
Not Standerd loom was badly poisoned!
--
Not Standerd loom used Mach Punch.
Electivire lost 32% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Electivire fainted.
Not Standerd loom's Poison Heal restored health!
Not Standerd loom restored 12% of its health.
--
Electivire soon gets his shit ruined by the now forgotten Breloom I saw way back in the beginning of the battle. It hits hard and fast, with an intensity I wished 'Vire had had.
me 4 - 3
gamer_reloaded switched in Porygon Z (lvl 100 Porygonz).
Porygon Z used Hyper Beam.
Not Standerd loom lost 86% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Not Standerd loom fainted.
--
I sent in Porygon next, not knowing much about either of them. Porygon was determined to seek my approval, and completely obliterated Breloom as my jaw dropped. Overkill much?
me 3 - 2
SaintSeiya switched in Fukin Annoying (lvl 100 Espeon ?).
Fukin Annoying used Hidden Power.
It's super effective!
Porygon Z lost 99% of its health.
Fukin Annoying lost 10% of its health.
Porygon Z must recharge!
--
My opponent switched in another pokemon I know nothing about, whilst I stare helplessly as Porygon recovers its artificial wits.
gamer_reloaded switched in Swampert (lvl 100 Swampert ?).
Fukin Annoying used Psychic.
Swampert lost 45% of its health.
Fukin Annoying lost 10% of its health.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.
--
Unsure of what to do, I was running out of options for securing the win. Lacking knowledge needed to make the team run smoothly didn't help either. I figured Swampert would be a good choice. How bad could it be?
Fukin Annoying used Grass Knot.
It's super effective!
Swampert lost 61% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Swampert fainted.
Fukin Annoying lost 10% of its health.
--
Oh. Dammit.
Tie 2 - 2
gamer_reloaded switched in Deoxys-E (lvl 100 Deoxys-e).
Deoxys-E is exerting its pressure!
Deoxys-E used Knock Off.
It's super effective!
Fukin Annoying lost 15% of its health.
Deoxys-E knocked off foe Fukin Annoying's Life Orb!
Fukin Annoying used Shadow Ball.
It's super effective!
Deoxys-E lost 5% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Deoxys-E fainted.
--
The best I could hope for now was to soften up his Rapeon enough for my final sweep to be successful. Deoxys goes down as a casualty.
SaintSeiya 2 - 1
gamer_reloaded switched in Gyarados (lvl 100 Gyarados ?).
Gyarados's intimidate cut Fukin Annoying's attack!
Fukin Annoying used Grass Knot.
A critical hit!
Gyarados lost 84% of its health.
Gyarados's Liechi Berry raised its attack!
Gyarados used Dragon Dance.
Gyarados's attack was raised.
Gyarados's speed was raised.
--
Whoa. Had that Life Orb still been there, Gyarados would have been a goner. But without it, it just gave me the win! Go go Gyara go!
Gyarados used Waterfall.
Fukin Annoying lost 55% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Fukin Annoying fainted.
--
Tie 1 - 1
SaintSeiya switched in A Fukin Cat (lvl 100 Luxray ?).
A Fukin Cat's intimidate cut Gyarados's attack!
Gyarados used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
A Fukin Cat lost 53% of its health.
SaintSeiya's A Fukin Cat fainted.
gamer_reloaded wins!
Props:
-SaintSeiya, for using what he wanted and not just a cookie cutter OU team
-Gallade, for pulling off a bulky set with competent success
-Porygon Z, for being too sexy for Hyper Beam
-Dusclops, for crithaxing past Gallade's defense
-SaintSeiya, for outpredicting me more often than not
Slops:
-SaintSeiya, for not Mach Punching Porygon like he should have
-My team, for sucking in general
-My predictions, for sucking in general
-Espeon, for being an Eevolution (but badass besides that fact)
Sorry if the story sucked. It's currently 2:24 am as I write this, so there.
Thanks for reading--hope you enjoyed
-A
Rules: Ladder Match, Sleep Clause, Freeze Clause, OHKO Clause, Evasion Clause, Species Clause, Strict Damage Clause
gamer_reloaded sent out Gallade (lvl 100 Gallade ?).
SaintSeiya sent out Not Standerd loom (lvl 100 Breloom ?).
gamer_reloaded: hi
SaintSeiya: sup
SaintSeiya switched in Damned Turtle (lvl 100 Torkoal ?).
Gallade used Taunt.
Damned Turtle fell for the taunt!
--
Knowing these were only practice, we exchanged friendly greetings as we let our pokemon out of their pokeballs. Breloom emerged from his, my huge Gallade from mine. He looked husky, but those were just his rippling muscles he built up from kicking so much ass. Of course, my opponent doesn't know that...
Gallade used Bulk Up.
Gallade's attack was raised.
Gallade's defence was raised.
Damned Turtle used Earthquake.
Gallade lost 16% of its health.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Fearing an Ice Punch, my opponent savvily retreats to his smokey turtle. Gallade proudly shows my opponent his bulging triceps, and laughs at its attemps to shake the ground. Impressive, eh? ;)
Gallade used Bulk Up.
Gallade's attack was raised.
Gallade's defence was raised.
Damned Turtle used Explosion.
Gallade lost 57% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Damned Turtle fainted.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Suddenly and without warning, my opponent's Torkoal just went off, surely out of the shame it felt from not being as dripping wet with awesome as Gallade. Gallade didn't seem to notice much, though. He just kept on posing, showing off his pecs to bystanders and passer-bys. Dammit Gallade! Now is NOT the time for that! Or, is it?
me 6 - 5
SaintSeiya switched in A Fukin Cat (lvl 100 Luxray ?).
A Fukin Cat's intimidate cut Gallade's attack!
gamer_reloaded: goddamn
Gallade used Drain Punch.
A Fukin Cat lost 47% of its health.
Gallade absorbed health!
Gallade restored 21% of its health.
A Fukin Cat used Crunch.
Gallade lost 15% of its health.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Finally, Gallade began paying attention to the battle, and not his physique in the mirror that appeared out of nowhere for no reason, and attacked using his sharp elbows. Then he used his opponent's blood to make himself a protein shake using a blender he pulled out of his pocket. I reminded myself to cancel Gallade's credit card.
SaintSeiya switched in Cyclops (lvl 100 Dusknoir ?).
Cyclops is exerting its pressure!
Gallade used Bulk Up.
Gallade's attack was raised.
Gallade's defence was raised.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Gallade started flexing again, as my opponent tried to find a way to deal with him. Look at those lateral obliques....
Gallade used Taunt.
Cyclops fell for the taunt!
Cyclops used Will-o-wisp.
Cyclops can't use Will-o-wisp after the taunt!
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
--
Gallade stopped kissing his biceps long enough to notice the Duskclops now before him. Rather than go back in his pokeball like I told him, he made fun of its whipped cream hair, and called him a 'fattie'. Apparently it hit a nerve--maybe some unresolved childhood issues--Dusclops didn't even finish its attack....it just stood there and started crying, while Gallade mocked him. Gallade! Don't be an asshole...
Gallade used Psycho Cut.
Cyclops lost 55% of its health.
Cyclops used Night Shade.
Gallade lost 30% of its health.
Gallade's leftovers restored its health a little!
Gallade restored 6% of its health.
Cyclops's leftovers restored its health a little!
Cyclops restored 6% of its health.
--
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It's super effective!
A critical hit!
Gallade lost 41% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Gallade fainted.
Cyclops's taunt wore off!
Cyclops's leftovers restored its health a little!
Cyclops restored 6% of its health.
--
Finally Gallade stopped messing around and started to battle. He does well, using his finely toned muscles to inflict great damage. Dusclops, however, seemed determined to stand up to his bully, and sent his shadow behind Gallade, and it tapped him on the shoulder. As Gallade turned around to see who it was, Dusclops ran up and kicked him in his steroid-shrunken poke-balls! Gallade went down after that; understandably. Maybe now he'll learn not to be such a prick...
Tie 5 - 5
Oh well. Serves him right. Now who's up next?
gamer_reloaded switched in Deoxys-E (lvl 100 Deoxys-e).
Deoxys-E is exerting its pressure!
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It's super effective!
Deoxys-E lost 32% of its health.
Deoxys-E used Knock Off.
It's super effective!
Cyclops lost 8% of its health.
Deoxys-E knocked off foe Cyclops's Leftovers!
--
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It's super effective!
A critical hit!
Deoxys-E lost 63% of its health.
Deoxys-E used Toxic.
Cyclops was badly poisoned!
Cyclops is hurt by poison!
Cyclops lost 6% of its health.
--
Having to put up with Gallade's antics made me lose concentration, and Deoxys gets battered a bit needlessly as a result. It seems Dusclops has some anger management problems.... it's still sobbing softly, flailing at Deoxys wildly. Time to change that.
gamer_reloaded switched in Porygon Z (lvl 100 Porygonz).
Cyclops used Shadow Sneak.
It doesn't affect Porygon Z...
Cyclops is hurt by poison!
Cyclops lost 12% of its health.
--
Porygon Z used Dark Pulse.
It's super effective!
Cyclops lost 31% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Cyclops fainted.
--
Heh. Don't know why I didn't do that sooner. Oh well. I prepared to see what my opponent would do next.
me 5 - 4
SaintSeiya switched in God Of Thunder Bitch (lvl 100 Raikou).
God Of Thunder Bitch is exerting its pressure!
gamer_reloaded switched in Electivire (lvl 100 Electivire ?).
God Of Thunder Bitch used Thunderbolt.
Electivire's Motor Drive increased its speed!
--
I may not know much about the pokemon I'm using, but I knew one thing. That Raikou was going to shove a Thunderbolt up Porygon's ass if I didn't do something. So I sent in Electivire, who enjoys that sort of thing. Electivire now has a jolly spring in his step. Hopefully he'll battle better than Gallade did...
Electivire used Taunt.
God Of Thunder Bitch fell for the taunt!
God Of Thunder Bitch used Extrasensory.
Electivire lost 48% of its health.
God Of Thunder Bitch lost 10% of its health.
--
...instead, I witness the product of the friendship between Gallade and Electivire. Apparently, a mutual hatred of skinny, flabby bodies is what keeps the two meatheads together. Raikou is made of sterner stuff than his teammate, though, and Electivire quickly re-focuses on the battle.
Electivire used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
God Of Thunder Bitch lost 90% of its health.
SaintSeiya's God Of Thunder Bitch fainted.
Electivire lost 10% of its health.
--
...'Vire quickly finishes off his foe, gloating in his insufferable macho idiom. I have got to keep those two apart...
me 5 - 3
SaintSeiya switched in A Fukin Cat (lvl 100 Luxray ?).
A Fukin Cat's intimidate cut Electivire's attack!
SaintSeiya switched in Not Standerd loom (lvl 100 Breloom ?).
Electivire used Earthquake.
It's not very effective...
Not Standerd loom lost 26% of its health.
Electivire lost 10% of its health.
Not Standerd loom was badly poisoned!
--
Not Standerd loom used Mach Punch.
Electivire lost 32% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Electivire fainted.
Not Standerd loom's Poison Heal restored health!
Not Standerd loom restored 12% of its health.
--
Electivire soon gets his shit ruined by the now forgotten Breloom I saw way back in the beginning of the battle. It hits hard and fast, with an intensity I wished 'Vire had had.
me 4 - 3
gamer_reloaded switched in Porygon Z (lvl 100 Porygonz).
Porygon Z used Hyper Beam.
Not Standerd loom lost 86% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Not Standerd loom fainted.
--
I sent in Porygon next, not knowing much about either of them. Porygon was determined to seek my approval, and completely obliterated Breloom as my jaw dropped. Overkill much?
me 3 - 2
SaintSeiya switched in Fukin Annoying (lvl 100 Espeon ?).
Fukin Annoying used Hidden Power.
It's super effective!
Porygon Z lost 99% of its health.
Fukin Annoying lost 10% of its health.
Porygon Z must recharge!
--
My opponent switched in another pokemon I know nothing about, whilst I stare helplessly as Porygon recovers its artificial wits.
gamer_reloaded switched in Swampert (lvl 100 Swampert ?).
Fukin Annoying used Psychic.
Swampert lost 45% of its health.
Fukin Annoying lost 10% of its health.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.
--
Unsure of what to do, I was running out of options for securing the win. Lacking knowledge needed to make the team run smoothly didn't help either. I figured Swampert would be a good choice. How bad could it be?
Fukin Annoying used Grass Knot.
It's super effective!
Swampert lost 61% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Swampert fainted.
Fukin Annoying lost 10% of its health.
--
Oh. Dammit.
Tie 2 - 2
gamer_reloaded switched in Deoxys-E (lvl 100 Deoxys-e).
Deoxys-E is exerting its pressure!
Deoxys-E used Knock Off.
It's super effective!
Fukin Annoying lost 15% of its health.
Deoxys-E knocked off foe Fukin Annoying's Life Orb!
Fukin Annoying used Shadow Ball.
It's super effective!
Deoxys-E lost 5% of its health.
gamer_reloaded's Deoxys-E fainted.
--
The best I could hope for now was to soften up his Rapeon enough for my final sweep to be successful. Deoxys goes down as a casualty.
SaintSeiya 2 - 1
gamer_reloaded switched in Gyarados (lvl 100 Gyarados ?).
Gyarados's intimidate cut Fukin Annoying's attack!
Fukin Annoying used Grass Knot.
A critical hit!
Gyarados lost 84% of its health.
Gyarados's Liechi Berry raised its attack!
Gyarados used Dragon Dance.
Gyarados's attack was raised.
Gyarados's speed was raised.
--
Whoa. Had that Life Orb still been there, Gyarados would have been a goner. But without it, it just gave me the win! Go go Gyara go!
Gyarados used Waterfall.
Fukin Annoying lost 55% of its health.
SaintSeiya's Fukin Annoying fainted.
--
Tie 1 - 1
SaintSeiya switched in A Fukin Cat (lvl 100 Luxray ?).
A Fukin Cat's intimidate cut Gyarados's attack!
Gyarados used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
A Fukin Cat lost 53% of its health.
SaintSeiya's A Fukin Cat fainted.
gamer_reloaded wins!
Props:
-SaintSeiya, for using what he wanted and not just a cookie cutter OU team
-Gallade, for pulling off a bulky set with competent success
-Porygon Z, for being too sexy for Hyper Beam
-Dusclops, for crithaxing past Gallade's defense
-SaintSeiya, for outpredicting me more often than not
Slops:
-SaintSeiya, for not Mach Punching Porygon like he should have
-My team, for sucking in general
-My predictions, for sucking in general
-Espeon, for being an Eevolution (but badass besides that fact)
Sorry if the story sucked. It's currently 2:24 am as I write this, so there.
Thanks for reading--hope you enjoyed
-A