Forums · Pocketing, The Beautiful Sport
Faced with class after class of revision before exams in two weeks, my friend devised an excellent game that can be played by any person at any time during school. The game is called Pocketing, the players Pocketeers, and here's how you do it:
Pocketing in its most basic form is sticking your finger into somebody elses pocket for a minimum of 5 seconds without them noticing. Sound gay? Get over it. You barely have to have your finger in there, it's not like your sticking your hand in and giving them a grope, and girls are potential targets, too. Now, at my school there is a uniform. For the guys pants with two side pockets and one back pocket + a Polar-fleece with two zipped pockets. And for the girls the same polar-fleeces and kilts with one zip pocket.
Naturally, different circumstances will make for more difficult targets, so the points (as I can remember them) are as follow:
Normal Pocket - 1 point
Back Pocket - 5 points (Or 10 if the target's sitting down)
Chest Pocket - 5 points (This one's great on girls, but not all tops have breast pockets)
Unzipping anything - 5 points (I think, may be 10)
Pickpocketing - 6 points (I think, again not sure. You can't keep anything you steal, that's against the law.)
Moving an object from one pocket to another - 11 points (Not sure once again.)
Through the fly - 10 points
x2 if they're walking as you pocket them.
x3 if they're a teacher.
x3 if they're Declan ("It's such a lameass gay game...")
x2 if they're Loomuico ("Yeah, I agree with Declan...")
Kicking Ben in the nuts - 10 points
All points are to be kept in a tally on one's forearm.
Obviously the last 3 don't matter unless you go to my school.
We do have the rules written out, but the friend that made the game up has them somewhere. There's also a '100 points for getting a hand down a blouse without the girl noticing for 5 seconds', but the likelihood of them not noticing is pretty low.
I'm quite honest when I say that most people have embraced this sport heartily. Some douches who are uncomfortable with their sexuality call it 'Gay' but they're fools. You walk around the school and see groups of people with their hands in their pockets, watching each other edgily, it trains you to be more alert and more sneaky and provides a lot of hilarious moments.
For example:
My Science teacher is an alright guy. A Young teacher, so not yet too crabby he tends to crack jokes as often as we do and shrugs off appalling behaviour with a toothy grin and intelligent insult flooding with a Jimmy Carr-like accent. Some of what I'm about to describe may seem extremely strange to Americans, if the American schools I see on tv are an accurate reflection of real life, that is. The teacher was standing behind me, facing the occupants of the desk behind the one I share with a girl named Rosa, and having a play-argument with the ever-argumentative young lady behind me. By that point (about ten minutes into the period) everyone in the class knew what the game was and there were people sneaking about attempting to Pocket one another.
A group watched on encouragingly as I eyed the blue Roll sheet folded neatly and just barely sticking out of my teacher's back pocket. Behind me Rosa was almost in hysterics watching me try to decide whether or not to go for the 18-pointer. Meanwhile, the argument raged on. Time was one thing I had no shortage of. Then a friend of mine, a big, muscley guy who's hilarious in his own unusual way decided he would help me, free of charge by distracting the teacher. Now, at the start of almost every science period this year, this friend of mine has embraced the teacher in a tight, manly hug which is never returned but met with a roll of the eyes. My friend stepped casually towards the teacher who turned in apprehension of the coming squeeze and just as he was clobbered I reached forward and snapped the paper from the pocket.
The group of people watching applauded my success and laughed, but as the distraction subsided the teacher returned to his meaningless conversation. Now I had an extra 18 points and if I could get the paper back into the other pocket I would get an extra 33 (according to the game's creator's calculations.) Another distraction was in order and delivered and I carefully, slowly leaned towards the other back pocket, painfully aware of the wallet it held making replacement difficult. I tried to slide the paper in but it was just too wide for the pocket. My sleek movements turned into thrashing forceful pushes and at last I was found out.
The teacher, who was beginning to understand the notion of pocketing grabbed the paper from my hand, rolled it up and hit me over the head with it half a dozen times, cursing me in his native tongue (British) in between blows. Such a reaction is customary, it's ok. He said something about having me for sexual abuse and I and a few others told him there was nothing sexual about it...
In any case, that was 18 points and an enjoyable experience.
Go ahead! Introduce Pocketing to your school, once everyone knows what the hell you're doing with your finger in someone's pocket, it's all good.
Pocketing in its most basic form is sticking your finger into somebody elses pocket for a minimum of 5 seconds without them noticing. Sound gay? Get over it. You barely have to have your finger in there, it's not like your sticking your hand in and giving them a grope, and girls are potential targets, too. Now, at my school there is a uniform. For the guys pants with two side pockets and one back pocket + a Polar-fleece with two zipped pockets. And for the girls the same polar-fleeces and kilts with one zip pocket.
Naturally, different circumstances will make for more difficult targets, so the points (as I can remember them) are as follow:
Normal Pocket - 1 point
Back Pocket - 5 points (Or 10 if the target's sitting down)
Chest Pocket - 5 points (This one's great on girls, but not all tops have breast pockets)
Unzipping anything - 5 points (I think, may be 10)
Pickpocketing - 6 points (I think, again not sure. You can't keep anything you steal, that's against the law.)
Moving an object from one pocket to another - 11 points (Not sure once again.)
Through the fly - 10 points
x2 if they're walking as you pocket them.
x3 if they're a teacher.
x3 if they're Declan ("It's such a lameass gay game...")
x2 if they're Loomuico ("Yeah, I agree with Declan...")
Kicking Ben in the nuts - 10 points
All points are to be kept in a tally on one's forearm.
Obviously the last 3 don't matter unless you go to my school.
We do have the rules written out, but the friend that made the game up has them somewhere. There's also a '100 points for getting a hand down a blouse without the girl noticing for 5 seconds', but the likelihood of them not noticing is pretty low.
I'm quite honest when I say that most people have embraced this sport heartily. Some douches who are uncomfortable with their sexuality call it 'Gay' but they're fools. You walk around the school and see groups of people with their hands in their pockets, watching each other edgily, it trains you to be more alert and more sneaky and provides a lot of hilarious moments.
For example:
My Science teacher is an alright guy. A Young teacher, so not yet too crabby he tends to crack jokes as often as we do and shrugs off appalling behaviour with a toothy grin and intelligent insult flooding with a Jimmy Carr-like accent. Some of what I'm about to describe may seem extremely strange to Americans, if the American schools I see on tv are an accurate reflection of real life, that is. The teacher was standing behind me, facing the occupants of the desk behind the one I share with a girl named Rosa, and having a play-argument with the ever-argumentative young lady behind me. By that point (about ten minutes into the period) everyone in the class knew what the game was and there were people sneaking about attempting to Pocket one another.
A group watched on encouragingly as I eyed the blue Roll sheet folded neatly and just barely sticking out of my teacher's back pocket. Behind me Rosa was almost in hysterics watching me try to decide whether or not to go for the 18-pointer. Meanwhile, the argument raged on. Time was one thing I had no shortage of. Then a friend of mine, a big, muscley guy who's hilarious in his own unusual way decided he would help me, free of charge by distracting the teacher. Now, at the start of almost every science period this year, this friend of mine has embraced the teacher in a tight, manly hug which is never returned but met with a roll of the eyes. My friend stepped casually towards the teacher who turned in apprehension of the coming squeeze and just as he was clobbered I reached forward and snapped the paper from the pocket.
The group of people watching applauded my success and laughed, but as the distraction subsided the teacher returned to his meaningless conversation. Now I had an extra 18 points and if I could get the paper back into the other pocket I would get an extra 33 (according to the game's creator's calculations.) Another distraction was in order and delivered and I carefully, slowly leaned towards the other back pocket, painfully aware of the wallet it held making replacement difficult. I tried to slide the paper in but it was just too wide for the pocket. My sleek movements turned into thrashing forceful pushes and at last I was found out.
The teacher, who was beginning to understand the notion of pocketing grabbed the paper from my hand, rolled it up and hit me over the head with it half a dozen times, cursing me in his native tongue (British) in between blows. Such a reaction is customary, it's ok. He said something about having me for sexual abuse and I and a few others told him there was nothing sexual about it...
In any case, that was 18 points and an enjoyable experience.
Go ahead! Introduce Pocketing to your school, once everyone knows what the hell you're doing with your finger in someone's pocket, it's all good.