Forums · Jerem and feraligatr • Page 2
Well, now that I've been eaten, I guess that gives me a right to post some criticism!
First off, well, I get that you write in a particular style and all mate, but your style limits a lot of things to your own imagination. I guess what I'm trying to say is, we don't know what's going through your head while your writing this stuff down, and if you leave gaps in the prose then you leave gaps for the reader that they have to fill based on an assumption.
What I'm saying is, your story might be great but if it's not told properly then it loses a lot of its oomph. When I write, I ignore absolutely all the criticism I get about the story itself - I don't feel it's relevant as I write stories that I like. I do however, take all criticisms of writing style very very seriously. A few other users have said that you need to slow down and improve on the presentation of your work, that you need to use more words to better convey your story and I agree with them. If you just took that little bit more time, then it would be so much of a better read.
Secondly, I guess the story itself is kind of fun. It has your standard fanfic structures, I suppose - characters from the source material, places from the source material and all being used to suit yourself -- even the biases towards Feraligatr and against Lucas are commonplace in a fanfic - so the story, again, is very fun to read. But again, presentation lets it down a little bit. Like, sometimes I struggle to tell who is actually speaking at a given moment.
And my God! The main character is so, well, evil! I have so many mixed emotions with this guy, I mean, he seems a fun character but as a protagonist I'm just not sure if I should be rooting for him or for Lucas (or for me). Is Jerem going to get some more Pok?mon? Because you could stage a very epic battle between him and Lucas that could be a very fun climax to read.
I really hope you take the criticism on board, because if the presentation is improved just that little bit, then it would be SUCH A FUN READ! You really are letting yourself down mate, because it's a great story that simply looks rushed.
Don't hate me!!
Oh; EDIT: Everyone who likes this should shoe on over to my topic and give mah prologue a read and give me some constructive criticism! I would much appreciate it ^>^!
First off, well, I get that you write in a particular style and all mate, but your style limits a lot of things to your own imagination. I guess what I'm trying to say is, we don't know what's going through your head while your writing this stuff down, and if you leave gaps in the prose then you leave gaps for the reader that they have to fill based on an assumption.
What I'm saying is, your story might be great but if it's not told properly then it loses a lot of its oomph. When I write, I ignore absolutely all the criticism I get about the story itself - I don't feel it's relevant as I write stories that I like. I do however, take all criticisms of writing style very very seriously. A few other users have said that you need to slow down and improve on the presentation of your work, that you need to use more words to better convey your story and I agree with them. If you just took that little bit more time, then it would be so much of a better read.
Secondly, I guess the story itself is kind of fun. It has your standard fanfic structures, I suppose - characters from the source material, places from the source material and all being used to suit yourself -- even the biases towards Feraligatr and against Lucas are commonplace in a fanfic - so the story, again, is very fun to read. But again, presentation lets it down a little bit. Like, sometimes I struggle to tell who is actually speaking at a given moment.
And my God! The main character is so, well, evil! I have so many mixed emotions with this guy, I mean, he seems a fun character but as a protagonist I'm just not sure if I should be rooting for him or for Lucas (or for me). Is Jerem going to get some more Pok?mon? Because you could stage a very epic battle between him and Lucas that could be a very fun climax to read.
I really hope you take the criticism on board, because if the presentation is improved just that little bit, then it would be SUCH A FUN READ! You really are letting yourself down mate, because it's a great story that simply looks rushed.
Don't hate me!!
Oh; EDIT: Everyone who likes this should shoe on over to my topic and give mah prologue a read and give me some constructive criticism! I would much appreciate it ^>^!
| QUOTE (Esoteric @ Sep 15 2007, 09:52 AM) |
| Well, now that I've been eaten, I guess that gives me a right to post some criticism! First off, well, I get that you write in a particular style and all mate, but your style limits a lot of things to your own imagination. I guess what I'm trying to say is, we don't know what's going through your head while your writing this stuff down, and if you leave gaps in the prose then you leave gaps for the reader that they have to fill based on an assumption. What I'm saying is, your story might be great but if it's not told properly then it loses a lot of its oomph. When I write, I ignore absolutely all the criticism I get about the story itself - I don't feel it's relevant as I write stories that I like. I do however, take all criticisms of writing style very very seriously. A few other users have said that you need to slow down and improve on the presentation of your work, that you need to use more words to better convey your story and I agree with them. If you just took that little bit more time, then it would be so much of a better read. Secondly, I guess the story itself is kind of fun. It has your standard fanfic structures, I suppose - characters from the source material, places from the source material and all being used to suit yourself -- even the biases towards Feraligatr and against Lucas are commonplace in a fanfic - so the story, again, is very fun to read. But again, presentation lets it down a little bit. Like, sometimes I struggle to tell who is actually speaking at a given moment. And my God! The main character is so, well, evil! I have so many mixed emotions with this guy, I mean, he seems a fun character but as a protagonist I'm just not sure if I should be rooting for him or for Lucas (or for me). Is Jerem going to get some more Pok?mon? Because you could stage a very epic battle between him and Lucas that could be a very fun climax to read. I really hope you take the criticism on board, because if the presentation is improved just that little bit, then it would be SUCH A FUN READ! You really are letting yourself down mate, because it's a great story that simply looks rushed. Don't hate me!! Oh; EDIT: Everyone who likes this should shoe on over to my topic and give mah prologue a read and give me some constructive criticism! I would much appreciate it ^>^! |
>_> he MIGHT get more pokemon but the thin kis i don't know, and eah ill go back and make it a little nicer to read
EDIT: i fixed just about all the spelling mistakes (i haven't capitalized al lthe Jerems and don't paln too)
im gonna continue the story from here because i can't edit my story for some reason...
as they prepare to take off, the ysee two people in the distance
ray:HALT jerem, TLF is looking for you
JTH:yes, your in a lot of trouble
jerem:hmm? is that so in that case, feraligatr, can you help me off here
feral:sure
ray:what do you think your doing?
feraligatr put jerem on the ground
jerem:FERALIGATR, ICE BEAM!!!
JTH:WHAT!?
feral:FERAL!!
RAY:go charizard, flamethrower!!
charizard comes out of the pokeball
char:CHAR!!!
jerem:FERALIGATR,HYDRO PUMP, salamence, EAT THOSE TWO!!
sala:got it
feral:FERAL!!
JTH:CRAP, RAY DO SOMETHING!!
RAY:CHARIZARD---
salmance flew over and gobled him up, now headig for JTH
jerem: salamence wait, FERALIGATR, ICE BEAM!!!
JTH: AHHH!!!!!!
JTH was frozen solid..
jerem:hahaha! hey whats this?
in JTH's hand that wasn't frozen jerem see's a pokeball, and has feraligatr bring it to himjerem:hm... GO POKEMON!
out comes a hippowdon
hippo:HIPPO!!
jerem:sweet
hippo:hippo?
jerem:huh? what's he saying
feral: he's aking what happened, should i tell him?
jerem: yeah,and ask him if he wouldn't mind having a new trainer..
feral:FERAL feral feral?
hippo: HIIIIPPO!
sala: he says yes
jerem: sweet, now retur--
suddenly a group of four people come up to them
MoI is leading them
jerem: MOI!, ILL KILL YOU!!
jerem tries to stand up, but falls down
jerem:oh crap i forgot
moi come right next to them
moi:hello jerem....
jerem:ugh, ill kill you
MoI:i doubt that, hear let me introduce you to--
jerem:feraligatr, ICE BEAM!
MoI:tsk tsk tsk jerem
the beam bounces off MoI
MoI:yes you must love our new advance in technolgy eh? anyway, let me introduce you to bobblyhead,truthness, and breloom
jerem:feraligatr, can you help me onto salamence?
feral:sure
feraligatr lifts jerem and puts him on salamence's back
jerem:now return hippowdon
hippo: HIPPO!
MoI: well see you shouldn't have done that because thats not your pokemon, its ours
bobbly:YEAH!
jerem: SHUT UP!
truthness:MAKE HIM!
jerem:feraligatr ice be--- oh nevermind
MoI:yes well anyway, weve come to take you away, for good
jerem:and how the hell do you plan on doing that?
breloom: GO BRELOOM!
jerem: >_>
truth:GO GENGAR!
bobbly: GO VILEPLUME!
MoI: and now my neswet pokemon, GO dragonite
jerem: quick feraligatr, hop on you guys can't take them all..
feral:yes
ferlaigatr hops on salamence and they begin to take off
brel: BRELOOM, SLEEP POWDER!
truth: GENGAR, HYPNOSIS!
MoI: DRAGONITE! GET THEM!
jerem: hurry salamence, feraligatr ICE BEAM DRAGONITE! and GO HIPPOWDON, use EARTHQUAKE!
hippo: HIPPO!
jerem: salamence why aren't you---
salmance was fast asleep, as well as feraligatr
jerem: GAH! hippowdon, its up to you
hippowdon used earthquake
breloom fainted
MoI: dragonite, GET HIM!
dragon: DRAGON!!
dragonite goes over and grabs jerem:
jerem: UGH LET GO!
MoI walks over to jerem and takes hippowdon and salamence's pokeball
MoI: return hippowdon and salamence
jerem: nooo
bobbly: hey where's that feraligatrs pokeball?
moi: yes jerem where is it?
jerem(smiling): thats none of your buisness
truth: well is that so well than,gengar hypnonsis
jerem: no, wait plea---
---in the TLF jail cel---
jerem: oh, where am I?
jerem looks around and sees nothing but darkness
jerem: OH CRAP! FERALIGATR!
no response
jerem: SALAMANCE? HIPPOWDON?
still no response
jerem: DAMMIT!
jerem stands up
jerem: whaa? i can stand? how long have i been here?
jerem walks around the small room with is the shape of a square, but very small
jerem:CRAP! WHERE AM I!
suddenly jerem heres tiny footsteps, which are that of some rattatas
jerem:LET ME OUT!!
he begins pounding on the wall
suddenly he hears a voice
MoI: hello jerem, this was something CKY was working on before you killed him, enjoy
suddenly CKY's voice comes on, it sounds like a recorded voice
CKY: hello there, i want to play a game...
CKY:as you can see, your trapped in a room with no exit,however a well over there in the corner leads you to a pit where you will die upon hitting the ground, if you do not go down there, then a giant pendulam will begin swinging down (familiar much?) and will kill you. the only means of escape is for you to stope the pendulam anfter the breaks the wall next to you, the game begins now
suddenly, jerem hears a loud swaying noise from the celing which is about 50 feet up
jerem: CRAP!! FUCK!! DAMMIT!! FUCK!!!!! ugh ok i must stay calm, ok now i just need to wait
suddenly CKY's voice comes back
cky: oh, and enjoy the acid rain
jerem: WHAAT!?
suddelny acid rain begins poring form the ceiling
CKY: that pit looks great now eh?
jerem: FUCK!!!! DAMMIT!!!!!
as the drops hit jerem, he begins to think back on his life
jerem: ok so if there is a stress on the ER than that means--
mom: what are you doing?
jerem: oh nothing
mom: well good, NOW DO YOUR CHORES!
jerem:FUCK!!!!! DAMN MY LIFE!!
mom: YOUR GROUNDED!
jerem: WHY!?
mom: because you didn't eat dinner last night
jerem:DAMMIT!!! KILL ME NOW!!!!
jerem(thinking):i don't know about this feraligatr, i hope i made the right idea doing this, maybe i should have hoped for something else
jerem(crying): NO! DAMMIT!
the acid finished dissolving most of the skin on his back
jerem: CRAP!!! FUCK
jerem begins to lose consiousness
jerem:ugh, i must, i must live...I MUST!!! AGH!!!!!
jerem(thinking):you know what, im glad i got feraligatr, hes so much fun, i don't know what is is but i feel a bond between us...
jerem:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
as jerem begins to close his eyes, a brush from the pendulam wakes him
jerem's skeleton began to get the rain
jerem: SOMEONE HELP ME!!!!FERALIGATR!!!!
jerem begins feeling an indescribable pain as his back begins to become drenched in blood from the rain,and his face shed down to his muscles, and the rest of his body just barely any muscle to protect his bones
suddenly the pendulam breaks the wall
jerem: i must....i must live...damn i...
jerem begins walknig to the exit, but the penulam strikes him knocing him into the corridor, but stunning him..
--camera room--
moi: WTF!!! HOW CAN HE LIVE!!! THATS IMPOSSIBLE!!!
fantasty: do not underestimate the human spirit
moi:BUT HOWWW? LOOK AT HIM!! HE'S A GODAMMNED SKELETON!!
fantasty: do not concern yourself with that MoI, he is strong and now you must let him free, he palyed your game and won
moi:DAMMIT FANTASTY, HE'LL KILL ME!
fantasty:then that shall be your death...
jerem:ugh, where am I? whaa? i'm alive?
jerem feels his back but nothing is there
jerem: WHAT THE HELL!
arceus: jerem...jerem...come here...
jerem: wh...who said that?
arceus:it is I, arceus the supreme ruler of the lands
jerem:a..arceus, yo..YOU REAL?
arceus:as real as can be, now come here
jerem:y..yes
jerem walks over to arceus
arceus:now, do you know where you are?
jerem: am i dead?
arceus:far from it, you are as alive as ever well will be anyway
jerem:what?
arceus:well you took quite a beating down there
jerem:down there, so we're in the hall of origin?
arceus: yes, anyway you are here, for i shall heal your wounds
jerem:why?
arceus:your people, they watch you, they know you, you have been granted a huge responsibilty
jerem:WHAT?
arceus:calm yourself child, you will take on the responsiblty of protecting this place
jerem:but i thuogh there was only one way to get here
arceus:the are several ways, one in which you will guard, take the flute and protect this place
jerem:i will
a flute apeears in front of jerem, and he takes it
arceus:i will heal you upon your return, goodbye
jerem begins to be pulled into a light
arceus:goodybe
...for now
when jerem wakes up, he finds himself in a jail cell with feraligatr
MoI: well look who came to
feral:JEREM!
jerem:ugh, where am i? my head hurts and i'm all dizzy
MoI:your in a jail cell with your precious feraligatr, WHERE THE HELL IS THAT THINGS POKEBALL!?
feraligatr smiles
jerem:ugh, umm oh right, thats none of your buisness
MoI:ugh, fine now answer this, HOW DID YOU GET HEALED!?
jerem remembers what happened
jerem:I'm magical
MoI: DAMMIT FANTASTY! MAKE HIM ANSWER!
fant:call yourself MoI your the one who said you wouldn't harm him if he lived
MoI: but it's impossibe to live through all that
fant:well....and.....you see....
fantasty goes rambling on
feral:jerem...what happened to you?
jerem: I...I...I can't explain it but..
jerem opens the palm of his hand and shows feraligatr the flute
feral: what is it?
jerem: ill tell you later, but now we need to escape, do you know wehere salamence and hippo's pokeballs are?
feral:the last I saw they were on the desk over there
feraligatr points past fantasty talking to MoI to a desk at the end of the hall way
jerem:good, now to find a way out...
---later---
MoI:ok here your lunch
MoI hands jerem a sandwich
MoI: and for the gatr...
MoI opens a little hatch and puts some starlys in it
jerem: hmp
feral:well its about time...
feraligatr hastly eats the starly's, while jerem is relectant to eat the sandwich.
jerem:Dammit, I'm allergic to penut butter.
MoI: That's too bad, your not getting any more food for a few more hours.
jerem:fine then
Jerem takes off the top part ofthe sandwhich, and throws it through the bars where it hits MoI
MoI: DAMN YOU!
Jerem laughs
MoI: DAMN YOU YOU LITTLE RUNT!
fantasty: Now MoI you must learn to......And........So remember to.........
fantasty begins babling
Jerem:Hmmm.... how can we get out?
jerem looks at feraligatr,who has a bit of indigestion
feral:I don't know, but those starlys sucked
feraligatr looks at his stomach
feral:And they gave me indigestion
Jerem:hmm..I just MIGHT have an idea...
---Night---
Jerem: GAH! I'm so bored
feral:me to
MoI walks into the room
MoI:ok you two, dinner
MoI puts some starlys into the hatch, and a sandwich
Jerem:GAH! Another sandwich?
feraligatr takes the starlys is hand, and hands jerem the sandwich
jerem: I hate you MoI
feral:just wait til we get out of here...
MoI: see you two in the A.M
MoI walks out the door
Jerem looks at the sandwich,and throws in out the cell
Jerem:ok feraligatr, lets do this
feraligatr nods, then opens his palm to let the starlys go
starly1: OH PLEASE DON'T EAT US!!
starly2: PLEASE!
feral:I'll only eat one of you, If you do something for me
starly1:OH PLEASE ANYTHING!
feral:see that desk over there?
starly1&2:YES!
feral:which ever one of you brings back those pokeballs will live,got it?
starly1&2: YESS!!
jerem:Will they do it?
feral:yes, NOW GO!
the two starlys fly through the hatch, pecking at each other to reach the pokeballs
jerem:I swear if they kill each other getting there...
starly2 got the pokeballs and was coming back.
starly1:NOOO!! I DON'T WANT TO DIE!!
starly2:TOO BAD! HAHA!
jerem and feraligatr look at each other with a grin on there faces
finnaly starly2 makes it back
starly2:I DID IT SEE!!
feral:Thank you
feraligatr takes the pokeballs and hands them to Jerem
starly1: PLEASE DON'T EAT ME!!
feral:Too bad for you, now I hope you taste good
starly1:EEK!
feraligatr eats starly1
starly:Now what happens to me?
feral:well...you die too.
starly2: WAIT YOU SAID...AHHH!!
feraligatr eats starly2
jerem:thank you feraligatr,now to get out of here.
Jerem:GO SALAMECE!
sala:SALA!
salamence looks around and see Jerem and feraligatr
sala:where are we?
Jerem:A TLF jail cell,now can you use flamethrower on those bars so we can escape?
sala:yeah
salamence burns the bars
jerem:lets go
the three leave the cell, Jerem and feraligatr hop on salamence, and they fly through the window into the night.
We see MoI in his bed, alarms sounding.
MoI:ugh whats going on?
Novkris runs into the room
Nov:JEREM HAS ESCAPED!
Moi:WHAT!?
nov:FOLLOW ME....
MoI gets out of the bed, and follows novkris to the cell
MoI:DAMMIT!!!!HOW COULD HE!!?!?!?! FUCK!!!!!!!!!
MoI looks atthe desk and see's the pokeballs missing
MoI: CRACKER!!!!!DAMMIT!!!!!
nov:I think we need a search party to go and---
suddenly the Jerem and co come crashing through the wall
Jerem:Hello MoI, get him feraligatr
feraligatr hops off salamence, runs over and grabs MoI,then hops back on and they fly off
Nov:MOI!!!
fantasty walks in the room
fant:Good bye MoI...
Jerem:SHUT UP!!
Moi:HELP ME SOMEONE!!
Jerem: I said SHUT UP!
they were flying on salamence in the night
Moi:HELP ME OH DEAR GOD HELP ME!!!
Jerem:fine then,GO HIPPODOWN, SIT ON HIM
hippodown come out on top of MoI
MoI:help me..
Jerem:now MoI, answer me this: why should I keep you alive?
MOI:I don't know, your crazy, get this fat hippo off me!
Jerem: well if you want to be like that, then answer me this: are you really MoI?
MoI:of course I am. Please get him off me, he's crushing me
Jerem:hippodown, come off him
hippodown gets off MoI
Jerem:I think your lieing to me MoI
MoI: I AM NOT!
Jerem: Yes, I think you are...HATDUDE!
MoI: WHAT? YOUR CRAZY YOUR----
Jerem: I'm right, you are not MoI, MoI is dead.
Hat: but how did you know?
Jerem: I am smarter than you think Hatdude
hat:But how?
Jerem: You are differnent than the MoI that one day, I pay attention to details, I could hear the un-easyines in your voice when you spoke to me.It was clear, to me anyway that it was a charade.
Hat:what will you do to me?
Jerem:well since feraligatr is sleeping, and salamence is busy right now, this "fat hippo" shall be your fate
Hat: PLEASE DON'T!
Jerem: salamence, take us down to the nearest forest
sala: got it
Jerem:Good bye hatdude
Hat: PLEASE!! DON'T!!
they had arived in the deep forest
Jerem: hippodown, here is your dinner
Jerem points to MoI
hippo: HIPPO!!
hippowdown goes up to Hatdude, mouth wide open
Hat:PLEASE, IF YOU HAVE ANY SENSE OF CARE YOU WOULD LET ME GO!
Jerem:too late, I do not forgive or forget, HIPPODOWN EAT HIM!
hippodown put his mouth over hatdude and shows hatdude in his mouth
Jerem:now eat him
Hat:I BEG YOU DON'T DO THI-----
hippodown swallowed Hatdude
Jerem:thank you, hey feraligatr...
feraligatr remained sleeping
Jerem:HEY FERALIGATR!
feraligatr woke up
feral: Hmm?
Jerem: we must officialy welcome our new party member.
feral: Welcome hippodown.
sala:Yes, welcome hippodown.
Jerem:Welcome hippodown.
hippo:thanks, I think I'm going to like you as my new trainer
Jerem:What was that?
feral:He says he likes you.
jerem:thanks, now I'm sure you guys are hungry...
----Anonymous' house----
Anot(sleep talking):err NO! I R king of the trash can
the phone rings
anot: AGH! what was that?
he looks and sees the phone ringing and picks it up.
Fant:Anonymous, Jerem is loose.
anot: WHAAT!?
Fant:Yes, we need you to come here as fast as possible to ensure your saftey,bring your pokemon
Anot: Yess sir Fantasty
Anonymous hangs up
Anot:ok time to get ready.
---Jth's house---
Jth (looking in the mirror): Oh look at you you hansom guy, those chicks will be all over you.
the phone rings
Jth picks it up
Jth:hello?
Fant:Jerem is loose
Jth:OMFG WHAT THE HELL?
Fant:yes, we need you here as soon as possible, bring your pokemon
Jth:ok fantasty
Jth hangs up
Jth:hmm...now where are those pokeballs?
---outside Anonymous' house---
jerem:ok, lets see if anybody's home.
Jerem knocks on the door
Anonymous opens the door
Anon:AGH!!!
Anonymous slams the door shut.
Jerem:Hmm... I guess he's heard about us.
feral: Awww, I guess hes gotta die then eh?
Jerem: Hellz ya
Jerem smiles
Jerem knocks on the door again
No answer
Jerem:Salamence
sala:Got it
salamence breaks down the door with his tail.
they see Anonymous in a frenzy getting his pokeballs.
Jerem: Feraligatr, ICE BEAM
feral: FERAL!
Anon: AGH!!! Go Garchomp!
garchomp comes out and gets hit by ice beam
garchomp fainted
Anon: FUCK!
Jerem:Feraligatr, aqua tail!
Anon: Go Ryperior!
ryperior fainted
Anon: >_> all this trash can buisness has gone to my head
Jerem(angry):HIPPODOWN, EARTHQUAKE!
Anon: AGH!!!!
the house begins to fall apart
Jerem: Get him feraligatr! Hippodown, salamence, get out of here
hippo and salamence: OK!
they leave the house
feral:got him
jerem:lets go..
they begin to walk towards the door, but some of the wall comes crashing down over it.
Jerem:Crap, feraligatr, can you punch a hole in the wall?
feral:Yeah
feraligatr creates a hole in the wall, and walks throught it
Jerem: AGH FUCK!
some of the ceiling hit him on the head.
Jerem:I should make a note not to use earthquake in a house...
the house comes crashing down over Jerem
Feral: JEREM!
sala: This is not good.
Anon: hahahahahaahahaahahahahaah....OH FUCK MY HOUSE!
Feral: FERAAAAAL!!
Anon: AGH FUCK YOU FERALIGAYTER
FERAL: FEEEERRRAAAAL!
feraligatr slashes Anonymous in the face
Hippo:You fucker Anonymous, already lost my new trainer. DAMN YOU, I HATE YOU!
Anon: hippodown? IS THAT YOU?
hippo:yes Anonymous , it is me
Anon: OMG OMG OMG!!
Hippo: DAMN YOU, I still hate you
Anon: why?
hippo: because you never let me do anything, unlike Jerem who already lets me eat anything
hippodown charges at Anonymous, knocking him down
hippo: I HATE YOU!!
hippodown get Anonymous in his mouth, but doesn't eat him
feral: so he understands you?
hippodown nods
sala: we need to get Jerem out.
suddenly Jth walks by Anonymous' house
Jth: WHAT THE HELL Anonymous? OH FUCK ITS JEREM'S POKEMON, GO FLYGON!
Feral: FERAL!
feraligatr used ice punch
flygon fainted
Jth: crap, that was the only one I could find.
feraligatr grabs Jth
Jth: LET ME GO!
Feral: FERAL!!!
Anon: Jth, HELP ME!!
Jth sees Anonymous inside hippodowns mouth
jth:Dammit Anonymous, where's your pokemon?
Anon:Defeated
hippodown closes his mouth, so he cannot talk to Jth
Sala: Ill get started on this rubble...
salamence whacks the pile with his tail, and most of it flys off.
They see jerem lying on the ground
feral: JEREM!
feraligatr lets go of Jth and runs to jerem
Jth tries to run away, but salamence stop him
Jth: DAMMIT!
Feral: JEREM!!
feraligatr hits him with his tail to wake him up, but he doesn't stir
feral: JEREM!...
arceus: welcome back jerem
jerem:ugh, did I die?
arceus:no,but you're unconscious
jerem:so why am I here?
arceus:I'm here to tell you that you need to come here
jerem:???
arceus:TLF, their planning to destroy me
jerem: WHAT!?
arceus:yes, I need you to come and protect me
jerem: Can't you protect yourself?
arceus:no, my protection is here, but if they come i will need some help
jerem: so you need me to come to the peak of the moutain and protect you?
arceus:yes, now hurry...
Jerem:Ugh, I really hate doing that
jerem is surrounded by feraligatr, salamence, and hippodown
feraligatr sees him wake up,and hits him in the face with his tail
jerem:Oww, what was that for?
feral: stop scarring me like that
sala:yeah
salamence swoops jerem up with his tail and puts him on his back
hippodown nods
jerem:ugh, im really dizzy now.Hey, wheres that person?
hippodown opens his mouth to reveal a very wet Anonymous,and Jth
Jerem:Ha, nice. Two people, thats awesome hippodown
the two were surprised at seeing light, but realize thy can escape, but hippodown shuts his mouth before they climb out
jerem: ok hippodown,let them out
hippodown opens his mouth, feraligatr goes near him to get ready to grab them
the two climb out of the mouth, all wet
Jth: I hate you Jerem
Anon:me two
Jerem: that's great.feraligatr, grab them
feraligatr grabs them before they even move
jerem: hippodown, open your mouth up wide
hippodown does so
Jerem:feraligatr, put one of them right in front of his mouth
feraligatr puts Anonymous in front of his mouth,Anonymous is too scared to move
Anon: I hate you
Jerem: walk into his mouth
Anon: NO!
Jerem: DO IT!
Anon: NO!
jerem looks at hippodown
hippodown then extends his tongue around Anonymous' leg, and pulls him in his mouth
Anon: AGH!!! HELP ME JTH!!!
Jth: I CAN'T! I WILL NOT FORGET YOU!
hippodown gets Anonymous in his mouth, then swallows him
Jth: Anonymous...
Jerem: thank you hippodown, next up to die, JTH, salamence, you get him
sala: thank you
feraligatr brings Jth in fornt of salamence
Jth: GO DIE JEREM! YOUR FERALIGATR SUCKS! HIPPOPHAIL, SALAFUC---
salamence ate Jth before he was finished.
Jerem:Now, we need to go to mt.coronet...
feral:why?
Jerem:cuz...we just have to
feral:WHY!!!!
Jerem pulls the azure flute from his pocket
Jerem:thats why...
---TLF---
fant: I think its time we do this
fantasty is in an office talking to someone
person:why?
fant:well with jerem,we need to do this before he can do some REAL damage to us person:are you saying the loss of some of our best memembrs, including mods are not real damage?
fant:No, its just...you know what I mean
person: Very well than fantasty, go to mt. coronet
fant:thank you iggy.....FF_ROCKS, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!
FF comes running into to the room
FF:Y...Yes?
fant:I want you to be the first one to mt. coronet, you know get everything ready
FF:Y...Yes sir
FF_rocks runs out
iggy: You better hope you guys don't run into Jerem
fant: we can take him..
We see FF go into a room
FF: TEN-HUT!
hundreds of caterpies were scattered in the room. suddenly they all line up. Tey all have a little uniform on.FF can't help but to take a picture to treasure it forever.
FF:We're going to Mt. Coronet
all the caterpies start making little noises
FF: Yes, our mission is to go and prepare to kill arceus
even louder noises are heard.
FF:NOW COME ON CATERPIES!
FF begins walking out, and the caterpies follow...
Jerem: how are you holding up feraligatr?
jerem and feraligatr were walking up mt. coronet, and hippodown and salmence were inside their pokeballs, for Jerem did not want them weakend
feral:I'm doing fine, but I'm hungry
Jerem:well it should'nt be hard to find some...
A wild dratini lept up from a pons where they were by
Jerem:there you go
Feral:FERAL!!
feraligatr charged towards the dratini, and swallowed it like spagetti.
Feral:Ahh
Jerem: lets continue...Hey, what's that?
Jerem looked down the cliff, and could distantly see FF and his caterpies
Jerem:Hmm, TLF I assume, we need to hurry
feral:Yeah, hop on!
Jerem: gets on feraligatr
feral:lets go
feraligatr begins to run up the snowy moutain, and they quickly reach the spear pillar
feral: now what?
Jerem: I don't know, here let me let those two out.
Jerem lets salamence and hippo out
suddenly FF appears
FF:JEREM! YES! I SHALL DISPOSE OF YOU!!!
suddenly FF's watch goes off
Fant:remember, DO NOT KILL JEREM
FF: FUCK
Jerem: who do you think you are? Kill me? HA!
suddenly all of FF's caterpies emerge
FF: WHAT NOW!!!
Jerem:FERALIGATR, EARTHQUAKE!
Feral: FERAL!!!
all of FF's caterpies fly off the pillar to their death
FF: NO!!!!!NO!!YOU BITCH!
Jerem: I'm not in the mood for yelling, salamence, whack him off the mountain
FF: WHAT!? THERE NOT GOING TO EAT ME!?
Jerem:You are not worth of that death.
FF: WORTHY!!?!? WHAT!?
---Jerems childhood----
teacher:today I will tell you about death,now it WILL happen, but how is different
Jerem:teacher, is there considered an "unworthy" way to die?
teacher: I'm glad you asked Jerem. There is indeed.Ill start with the very higly respected death, it would be something like being killed by a pokemon after being bestted in battle.Next, would be being killed by a person.Lower, an indirect kill form a pokemon.And finally,the lowest issuicide.
Jerem: but what if you don't die like that?
Teacher:well than is considered "terrible" and has no ranking at all
Jerem: got it...
Jerem: Not worth of that death
FF: WHY!?!
Jerem: I said I'm not in the mood for screaming, now salamence...
salamence already headed for FF, and whacked him off the side
Jerem:Good bye
FF: AHHHHHHHH
FF:AHHHHHHH
FF is falling down but suddenly is saved by a butterfree, and is lowered to the base of the mountain, where fantasty is waiting
fant: you failed
FF: B...b..BUT!
fant: I don't care about your exuses, you failed
FF: So why did butterfree save me?
Fant:So I can do this...
fantasty stabs FF with a knife.
but the knife doesnt go trough FF's kevlar laced shirt.
FF: ZOMFGWTF!?!?!
Fant: umm... you were meant to die...
FF: oh...
Fant: um.. yea...
FF: so, ill be going now...
Fant: uh.. yea... sure, bye
FF: bye.
FF sends out his butterfree
FF: were going home butterfree...
FF jumps on butterfree's back.
FF: well, cya Fant...
FF flies up, but all is not good, for butterfee gos up to high, back to the spear pillar, where Jerem is.
Jerem sees this, looks at his salamence and tells him to go after FF
salamence flies to butterfree and FF and eats them, then flies back
Jerem:Good job salamence
Salamence half smiles
Suddenly someone appears from the cave entrance
Squicks: Jerem....I HATE YOU!!!
Jerem: There you guys go again with the hate and the yelling and who the hell are you anyway? AND WHAT THE HELL!? ARE YOU A BOY OR GIRL!?
Squicks: I'M....I WAS JTH'S BOYFRIEND, BUT WHO KILLED HIM!!!
Jerem smiles
Squicks: AND I'M NOT TELLING YOU IF I'M A BOY OR GIRL!
Jerem: Seriously, I'm tired of this damn yelling, if the next TLF member that comes here does, I'm not gonna even bother to talk to them. As for you, I don't like you so your going to die.
Squicks: I DON'T THINK SO!!!....
Jerem sighs and motions feraligatr to kill squicks
... I WILL DEFEAT YOU WITH MY POK---
Feraligatr slashed squicks in the face.
Feral: I want a change in the way I kill these guys, just eating them isn't enough.
Jerem: Whatever you please Feraligatr.
Squicks was too much in pain to even say a word, butthe look on Squicks face showed extrme pain.
Feraligatr then slashed Squicks' face again. Tons of red gushy blood began to pour out, and feraligatr licked it as it did.
Squicks finnaly could talk again.
Squicks: FUCK FUCK AHHH HELP ME FANTASTY, YOU SAID THIS WOULDN'T HURT! AGHHH!!!
Feraligatr began tearing off her limbs and ate them.
Squicks: AGHHH!!!! AGHH!!!!!! AGHH DEAR GOD FANTASTY HELP ME!!!!!! AGHH!! FUCK YOU JEREM!!! THIS IS NOT THE WAY I WANT TO DIE!!!! FUCK YOU!
Feraligatr slashed squicks in the face again, picked up the body, and ate it.
Feral: Delicious, but my claws are all bloody.
Feraligatr holds out his claws to reveal that they were covered in Squick's blood.
Jerem: Use a hydro pump in the air, and let the water clean them when it falls back down.
Feraligatr nodded and tried it. It got all of it off.
Jerem: Now without anymor interuptions I hope, I will see what we can do with the flute.
Jerem pulls the azure flute out.
He walks around untill he see's the flute marking.
Jerem: This should be it...
Jerem begins to play the flute, but nothing happens.
Suddenly fantasty walks to the pillar, along with many many TLF members. They held a long object in there hand.
Fant: It seems we finnaly meet face to face Jerem.
Jerem: Who are you?
Fant: I am fantasty, leader of TLF, or Libelldra for short.
Jerem: What do the other letters stand for?
Fant: The and forge. Now tell me, why have you not sent your demon pokemon after me yet?
Jerem: Ugh.. I don't know, I guess because your not screaming like everyone else has, but I will later.
Fant: You shall have no later, do you know what this item is?
Fantasty points to the object there members were carrying.
Jerem:Umm...No.
Jerem turns around and looks at feraligatr who shakes his head, then he looks at salamence who also shakes his head.But when he looks at hippowdon, he nods.
Hippo: Hippo! hipp hippo hip hippo.
Jerem: What does that mean?
Sala: He says its an item known as the abyssal chain, the second item to bring forth arceus.
Fant: Well Jerem, have your pokemon told you anything?
Jerem: Yes actually
Jerem looks at salamence
sala: I'm not speaking english remember?
Jerem had a puzzled look on his face
Jerem: I forgot the difference
Fant: Anyway, do you know what the abyssal chain does?
Jerem: No
Fant:It will bring forth palkia and dialga, and when those two are together, a time paradox will begin. then arceus will have to stop it. Thus when he comes, we will kill him so WE LIBELLDRA WILL RULE THE LAND!
Jerem: There we go with the yelling again. Anyway, you won't live long enough to to bring forth palkia and dialga.
Jerem then signalled his pokemon to go after fantasty....
Fant:Have you forgotton already Jerem?
Jerem: What?
As Jerem's pokemon try to attack fantasty, they are stopped by a force field
Fant: You must love technology no?
Jerem: Go die.
Fant: You're no longer in control here Jerem, GO CRESSELIA AND DARKRAI!
Cresselia and darkrai come out
Fant: CRESSELIA, THUNDER WAVE JEREM, DARKRAI DARK VOID HIS POKEMON
Jerem who has a headace from the yelling gets hit by the thunder wave, paralyzing him. His pokemon also get hit by dark void.
Fant: Now that you're out of the way, MEN BRING FORTH THE CHAIN!
The members bring the chain towards the middle of the pillar
Fantasty walks over to it and pulls out a pice of parchment and begins to recite the words
As he does, the chain begins to glow
Fant:... and by the power of the god, RELEASE TO ME DIALGA MASTER OF TIME AND PALIKA MASTER OF SPACE!
The chain straighten outs and floats in the air.Fantasty backs away. Soon two wormholes appear near the end of the chains. The chain extends into them and it pulls out dialga and palkia.
Fant: LET THE FUN BEGIN!
Palkia see's dilga, and begins to attack.
Palkia: PALLLLLLLLLL!!!!
Dialga: DIALLLLL!!
The two titans begin attacking.
There attacks cause feraligatr to wake up, but he pretends to stay asleep.
Fant: NOTHING CAN STOP ME!
Fantasty walks over to Jerem and kicks him, and the azure flute falls out of his pocket
Fant: What do we have here?
Fantasty examines the flute
Fant:Is this.... THIS IS THE AZURE FLUTE! OH HOLY DAYS IT'S THE AZURE FLUTE.
Dialga and palkia's attacks begin to cause the dimension to shake violently
Fant: THIS SHALL GO BY FASTER THAN EVER!
Fantasty begins to play the flute
While everyone's attention is away, Feraligatr gets up behind the group of Libelldrans, and he goes into one of there bags. The TLF member turns around and Feraligatr slashes him in the face, then eats him beforew he can scream. Feraligatr then looks in the bag and finds a full heal
Feral (thinking): I hope this works...
Feraligatr crawls over to Jerem and sprays him with the full heal.
Jerem: Uhh, thanks feraligatr
Suddenly darkrai turns around and sees the two togeter, and he fires a dark void at them
Feraligatr sees this and covers Jerem from the blast. Feraligatr then falls back asleep.
Jerem: Thank you feraligatr.
Fantasty finishes playing the flute
A stairway to the hall of origin appears.
One of dialgas attacks hit it, and the hall shakes causing arceus to appear.
Arceus: ARRRR!!!!!!!
Iggybot appears from the cave entrance, and walks over to fantasty.
Iggy: Arceus, you're powers is no match for me.
Fantasty looks at him and backs away.
Iggy, Arceus, palkia, and dialga all begin to glow.
A light begins to emmit from them all.
Arceus tries to break free from this, but can't
Arceus: AR AR AR!!!
Pal: PALLL!!
Iggy: I'LL SEE YOU ALL IN HELL!
A giant light beam comes crashing down in the middle of them, engulfing the four.
Fant: IT'S WORKING, WE HAVE SUCCEDED
Jerem: You will see him in hell.
Jerem snuck up right behind fantasty
fantasty turns around
Fant: What the hell?
Jerem: AHHHHHHH!!
Jerem take fantasty to the ground, and begins to punch him the the face.
The TLF members run over to them
Jerem: I WILL KILL YOU!
The TLF members try to pull Jerem off, but they can't
Darkrai see's this and uses a dark void at Jerem, and it hits him but not before Jerem striked the final blow to Fantasty.
The light clears up from where the four were, and nothing remained.
The biggest TLF member, zero took fantasty and jerem and began to bring them down the mountain
Zero: You have failed Jerem, and you shall rue this day forever...
--------- Several Hours Later ----------
Jerem is in a small solitary confidment chamber. He has a straight jacket on, and is shackled to the wall. There are no windows in the room, and only one door.
Zero walks in.
Zero:'Bout damn time you woke up.
Jerem: Hrrm, Where am I?
Zero: In the most secure cell in the Sinnoh region, or I should say Libelldran region now that we've taken over.
Jerem:What?
Zero: Yep, you failed, but you did kill fantasty and for that...
Zero slaps Jerem in the face
Jerem: Bitch.
Zero smiles
Zero: I should also tell you that Salamence and hippowdon are dead.
Jerem: WHAT!?
Zero: Yep, we killed them at the spear pillar, they were way to corrupt. Your feraligatr is alive though.
Jerem started to cry a little bit, but stopped.
Zero: So here's how the rest of your life will be:
You will get breakfeast.
Several hours later, you will get lunch.
An hour after that, you will visit your feraligatr without our intrusion for ONE MINUTE everyday.
Jerem: I'll be able to be with him for one minute a day, without any guards?
Zero: Yes well we prefer not to have you in a killer mood forever, BUT you will be seperated by a foot of the strongest glass we have.Anyway after that:
You will be given dinner several hours later
You will then go to bed and will start this all over again.
Zero: And right now, we will let you vist your feraligatr
Jerem grunted
Some guards came into th room and unhooked the wall chain.
They brought Jerem to a room, with glass in the middle. On the other side was Feraligatr, in worse condition than he.
Feraligatr was in a stright jacket, and his jaws were bound togheter so tightly, that he could barely open it to speak. He was also chained to the walls from several directions. Suddenly he looked up and saw Jerem.
Feral: I'm sorry Jerem...
Jerem: No, I am sorry. This is my fault, you were better off without me.
Feral: I was not, I hated my life before we met, I was in worse... well, similar conditons to this, but now I at least have a friend.
Jerem: Thanks. Did you hear what happened to salamence and hippowdon?
Feral: Yes...
Feraligatr looked down.
Jerem: We will find away to avenge them.
Feral: Thats doubtful, we have NO means of escape.
Jerem: But....we must find a way...
Guards entered the room
Guard: TIMES UP!
The two looked at each other, they knew they would have a long long long life ahead of them.
THE END OF PART 1
as they prepare to take off, the ysee two people in the distance
ray:HALT jerem, TLF is looking for you
JTH:yes, your in a lot of trouble
jerem:hmm? is that so in that case, feraligatr, can you help me off here
feral:sure
ray:what do you think your doing?
feraligatr put jerem on the ground
jerem:FERALIGATR, ICE BEAM!!!
JTH:WHAT!?
feral:FERAL!!
RAY:go charizard, flamethrower!!
charizard comes out of the pokeball
char:CHAR!!!
jerem:FERALIGATR,HYDRO PUMP, salamence, EAT THOSE TWO!!
sala:got it
feral:FERAL!!
JTH:CRAP, RAY DO SOMETHING!!
RAY:CHARIZARD---
salmance flew over and gobled him up, now headig for JTH
jerem: salamence wait, FERALIGATR, ICE BEAM!!!
JTH: AHHH!!!!!!
JTH was frozen solid..
jerem:hahaha! hey whats this?
in JTH's hand that wasn't frozen jerem see's a pokeball, and has feraligatr bring it to himjerem:hm... GO POKEMON!
out comes a hippowdon
hippo:HIPPO!!
jerem:sweet
hippo:hippo?
jerem:huh? what's he saying
feral: he's aking what happened, should i tell him?
jerem: yeah,and ask him if he wouldn't mind having a new trainer..
feral:FERAL feral feral?
hippo: HIIIIPPO!
sala: he says yes
jerem: sweet, now retur--
suddenly a group of four people come up to them
MoI is leading them
jerem: MOI!, ILL KILL YOU!!
jerem tries to stand up, but falls down
jerem:oh crap i forgot
moi come right next to them
moi:hello jerem....
jerem:ugh, ill kill you
MoI:i doubt that, hear let me introduce you to--
jerem:feraligatr, ICE BEAM!
MoI:tsk tsk tsk jerem
the beam bounces off MoI
MoI:yes you must love our new advance in technolgy eh? anyway, let me introduce you to bobblyhead,truthness, and breloom
jerem:feraligatr, can you help me onto salamence?
feral:sure
feraligatr lifts jerem and puts him on salamence's back
jerem:now return hippowdon
hippo: HIPPO!
MoI: well see you shouldn't have done that because thats not your pokemon, its ours
bobbly:YEAH!
jerem: SHUT UP!
truthness:MAKE HIM!
jerem:feraligatr ice be--- oh nevermind
MoI:yes well anyway, weve come to take you away, for good
jerem:and how the hell do you plan on doing that?
breloom: GO BRELOOM!
jerem: >_>
truth:GO GENGAR!
bobbly: GO VILEPLUME!
MoI: and now my neswet pokemon, GO dragonite
jerem: quick feraligatr, hop on you guys can't take them all..
feral:yes
ferlaigatr hops on salamence and they begin to take off
brel: BRELOOM, SLEEP POWDER!
truth: GENGAR, HYPNOSIS!
MoI: DRAGONITE! GET THEM!
jerem: hurry salamence, feraligatr ICE BEAM DRAGONITE! and GO HIPPOWDON, use EARTHQUAKE!
hippo: HIPPO!
jerem: salamence why aren't you---
salmance was fast asleep, as well as feraligatr
jerem: GAH! hippowdon, its up to you
hippowdon used earthquake
breloom fainted
MoI: dragonite, GET HIM!
dragon: DRAGON!!
dragonite goes over and grabs jerem:
jerem: UGH LET GO!
MoI walks over to jerem and takes hippowdon and salamence's pokeball
MoI: return hippowdon and salamence
jerem: nooo
bobbly: hey where's that feraligatrs pokeball?
moi: yes jerem where is it?
jerem(smiling): thats none of your buisness
truth: well is that so well than,gengar hypnonsis
jerem: no, wait plea---
---in the TLF jail cel---
jerem: oh, where am I?
jerem looks around and sees nothing but darkness
jerem: OH CRAP! FERALIGATR!
no response
jerem: SALAMANCE? HIPPOWDON?
still no response
jerem: DAMMIT!
jerem stands up
jerem: whaa? i can stand? how long have i been here?
jerem walks around the small room with is the shape of a square, but very small
jerem:CRAP! WHERE AM I!
suddenly jerem heres tiny footsteps, which are that of some rattatas
jerem:LET ME OUT!!
he begins pounding on the wall
suddenly he hears a voice
MoI: hello jerem, this was something CKY was working on before you killed him, enjoy
suddenly CKY's voice comes on, it sounds like a recorded voice
CKY: hello there, i want to play a game...
CKY:as you can see, your trapped in a room with no exit,however a well over there in the corner leads you to a pit where you will die upon hitting the ground, if you do not go down there, then a giant pendulam will begin swinging down (familiar much?) and will kill you. the only means of escape is for you to stope the pendulam anfter the breaks the wall next to you, the game begins now
suddenly, jerem hears a loud swaying noise from the celing which is about 50 feet up
jerem: CRAP!! FUCK!! DAMMIT!! FUCK!!!!! ugh ok i must stay calm, ok now i just need to wait
suddenly CKY's voice comes back
cky: oh, and enjoy the acid rain
jerem: WHAAT!?
suddelny acid rain begins poring form the ceiling
CKY: that pit looks great now eh?
jerem: FUCK!!!! DAMMIT!!!!!
as the drops hit jerem, he begins to think back on his life
jerem: ok so if there is a stress on the ER than that means--
mom: what are you doing?
jerem: oh nothing
mom: well good, NOW DO YOUR CHORES!
jerem:FUCK!!!!! DAMN MY LIFE!!
mom: YOUR GROUNDED!
jerem: WHY!?
mom: because you didn't eat dinner last night
jerem:DAMMIT!!! KILL ME NOW!!!!
jerem(thinking):i don't know about this feraligatr, i hope i made the right idea doing this, maybe i should have hoped for something else
jerem(crying): NO! DAMMIT!
the acid finished dissolving most of the skin on his back
jerem: CRAP!!! FUCK
jerem begins to lose consiousness
jerem:ugh, i must, i must live...I MUST!!! AGH!!!!!
jerem(thinking):you know what, im glad i got feraligatr, hes so much fun, i don't know what is is but i feel a bond between us...
jerem:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
as jerem begins to close his eyes, a brush from the pendulam wakes him
jerem's skeleton began to get the rain
jerem: SOMEONE HELP ME!!!!FERALIGATR!!!!
jerem begins feeling an indescribable pain as his back begins to become drenched in blood from the rain,and his face shed down to his muscles, and the rest of his body just barely any muscle to protect his bones
suddenly the pendulam breaks the wall
jerem: i must....i must live...damn i...
jerem begins walknig to the exit, but the penulam strikes him knocing him into the corridor, but stunning him..
--camera room--
moi: WTF!!! HOW CAN HE LIVE!!! THATS IMPOSSIBLE!!!
fantasty: do not underestimate the human spirit
moi:BUT HOWWW? LOOK AT HIM!! HE'S A GODAMMNED SKELETON!!
fantasty: do not concern yourself with that MoI, he is strong and now you must let him free, he palyed your game and won
moi:DAMMIT FANTASTY, HE'LL KILL ME!
fantasty:then that shall be your death...
jerem:ugh, where am I? whaa? i'm alive?
jerem feels his back but nothing is there
jerem: WHAT THE HELL!
arceus: jerem...jerem...come here...
jerem: wh...who said that?
arceus:it is I, arceus the supreme ruler of the lands
jerem:a..arceus, yo..YOU REAL?
arceus:as real as can be, now come here
jerem:y..yes
jerem walks over to arceus
arceus:now, do you know where you are?
jerem: am i dead?
arceus:far from it, you are as alive as ever well will be anyway
jerem:what?
arceus:well you took quite a beating down there
jerem:down there, so we're in the hall of origin?
arceus: yes, anyway you are here, for i shall heal your wounds
jerem:why?
arceus:your people, they watch you, they know you, you have been granted a huge responsibilty
jerem:WHAT?
arceus:calm yourself child, you will take on the responsiblty of protecting this place
jerem:but i thuogh there was only one way to get here
arceus:the are several ways, one in which you will guard, take the flute and protect this place
jerem:i will
a flute apeears in front of jerem, and he takes it
arceus:i will heal you upon your return, goodbye
jerem begins to be pulled into a light
arceus:goodybe
...for now
when jerem wakes up, he finds himself in a jail cell with feraligatr
MoI: well look who came to
feral:JEREM!
jerem:ugh, where am i? my head hurts and i'm all dizzy
MoI:your in a jail cell with your precious feraligatr, WHERE THE HELL IS THAT THINGS POKEBALL!?
feraligatr smiles
jerem:ugh, umm oh right, thats none of your buisness
MoI:ugh, fine now answer this, HOW DID YOU GET HEALED!?
jerem remembers what happened
jerem:I'm magical
MoI: DAMMIT FANTASTY! MAKE HIM ANSWER!
fant:call yourself MoI your the one who said you wouldn't harm him if he lived
MoI: but it's impossibe to live through all that
fant:well....and.....you see....
fantasty goes rambling on
feral:jerem...what happened to you?
jerem: I...I...I can't explain it but..
jerem opens the palm of his hand and shows feraligatr the flute
feral: what is it?
jerem: ill tell you later, but now we need to escape, do you know wehere salamence and hippo's pokeballs are?
feral:the last I saw they were on the desk over there
feraligatr points past fantasty talking to MoI to a desk at the end of the hall way
jerem:good, now to find a way out...
---later---
MoI:ok here your lunch
MoI hands jerem a sandwich
MoI: and for the gatr...
MoI opens a little hatch and puts some starlys in it
jerem: hmp
feral:well its about time...
feraligatr hastly eats the starly's, while jerem is relectant to eat the sandwich.
jerem:Dammit, I'm allergic to penut butter.
MoI: That's too bad, your not getting any more food for a few more hours.
jerem:fine then
Jerem takes off the top part ofthe sandwhich, and throws it through the bars where it hits MoI
MoI: DAMN YOU!
Jerem laughs
MoI: DAMN YOU YOU LITTLE RUNT!
fantasty: Now MoI you must learn to......And........So remember to.........
fantasty begins babling
Jerem:Hmmm.... how can we get out?
jerem looks at feraligatr,who has a bit of indigestion
feral:I don't know, but those starlys sucked
feraligatr looks at his stomach
feral:And they gave me indigestion
Jerem:hmm..I just MIGHT have an idea...
---Night---
Jerem: GAH! I'm so bored
feral:me to
MoI walks into the room
MoI:ok you two, dinner
MoI puts some starlys into the hatch, and a sandwich
Jerem:GAH! Another sandwich?
feraligatr takes the starlys is hand, and hands jerem the sandwich
jerem: I hate you MoI
feral:just wait til we get out of here...
MoI: see you two in the A.M
MoI walks out the door
Jerem looks at the sandwich,and throws in out the cell
Jerem:ok feraligatr, lets do this
feraligatr nods, then opens his palm to let the starlys go
starly1: OH PLEASE DON'T EAT US!!
starly2: PLEASE!
feral:I'll only eat one of you, If you do something for me
starly1:OH PLEASE ANYTHING!
feral:see that desk over there?
starly1&2:YES!
feral:which ever one of you brings back those pokeballs will live,got it?
starly1&2: YESS!!
jerem:Will they do it?
feral:yes, NOW GO!
the two starlys fly through the hatch, pecking at each other to reach the pokeballs
jerem:I swear if they kill each other getting there...
starly2 got the pokeballs and was coming back.
starly1:NOOO!! I DON'T WANT TO DIE!!
starly2:TOO BAD! HAHA!
jerem and feraligatr look at each other with a grin on there faces
finnaly starly2 makes it back
starly2:I DID IT SEE!!
feral:Thank you
feraligatr takes the pokeballs and hands them to Jerem
starly1: PLEASE DON'T EAT ME!!
feral:Too bad for you, now I hope you taste good
starly1:EEK!
feraligatr eats starly1
starly:Now what happens to me?
feral:well...you die too.
starly2: WAIT YOU SAID...AHHH!!
feraligatr eats starly2
jerem:thank you feraligatr,now to get out of here.
Jerem:GO SALAMECE!
sala:SALA!
salamence looks around and see Jerem and feraligatr
sala:where are we?
Jerem:A TLF jail cell,now can you use flamethrower on those bars so we can escape?
sala:yeah
salamence burns the bars
jerem:lets go
the three leave the cell, Jerem and feraligatr hop on salamence, and they fly through the window into the night.
We see MoI in his bed, alarms sounding.
MoI:ugh whats going on?
Novkris runs into the room
Nov:JEREM HAS ESCAPED!
Moi:WHAT!?
nov:FOLLOW ME....
MoI gets out of the bed, and follows novkris to the cell
MoI:DAMMIT!!!!HOW COULD HE!!?!?!?! FUCK!!!!!!!!!
MoI looks atthe desk and see's the pokeballs missing
MoI: CRACKER!!!!!DAMMIT!!!!!
nov:I think we need a search party to go and---
suddenly the Jerem and co come crashing through the wall
Jerem:Hello MoI, get him feraligatr
feraligatr hops off salamence, runs over and grabs MoI,then hops back on and they fly off
Nov:MOI!!!
fantasty walks in the room
fant:Good bye MoI...
Jerem:SHUT UP!!
Moi:HELP ME SOMEONE!!
Jerem: I said SHUT UP!
they were flying on salamence in the night
Moi:HELP ME OH DEAR GOD HELP ME!!!
Jerem:fine then,GO HIPPODOWN, SIT ON HIM
hippodown come out on top of MoI
MoI:help me..
Jerem:now MoI, answer me this: why should I keep you alive?
MOI:I don't know, your crazy, get this fat hippo off me!
Jerem: well if you want to be like that, then answer me this: are you really MoI?
MoI:of course I am. Please get him off me, he's crushing me
Jerem:hippodown, come off him
hippodown gets off MoI
Jerem:I think your lieing to me MoI
MoI: I AM NOT!
Jerem: Yes, I think you are...HATDUDE!
MoI: WHAT? YOUR CRAZY YOUR----
Jerem: I'm right, you are not MoI, MoI is dead.
Hat: but how did you know?
Jerem: I am smarter than you think Hatdude
hat:But how?
Jerem: You are differnent than the MoI that one day, I pay attention to details, I could hear the un-easyines in your voice when you spoke to me.It was clear, to me anyway that it was a charade.
Hat:what will you do to me?
Jerem:well since feraligatr is sleeping, and salamence is busy right now, this "fat hippo" shall be your fate
Hat: PLEASE DON'T!
Jerem: salamence, take us down to the nearest forest
sala: got it
Jerem:Good bye hatdude
Hat: PLEASE!! DON'T!!
they had arived in the deep forest
Jerem: hippodown, here is your dinner
Jerem points to MoI
hippo: HIPPO!!
hippowdown goes up to Hatdude, mouth wide open
Hat:PLEASE, IF YOU HAVE ANY SENSE OF CARE YOU WOULD LET ME GO!
Jerem:too late, I do not forgive or forget, HIPPODOWN EAT HIM!
hippodown put his mouth over hatdude and shows hatdude in his mouth
Jerem:now eat him
Hat:I BEG YOU DON'T DO THI-----
hippodown swallowed Hatdude
Jerem:thank you, hey feraligatr...
feraligatr remained sleeping
Jerem:HEY FERALIGATR!
feraligatr woke up
feral: Hmm?
Jerem: we must officialy welcome our new party member.
feral: Welcome hippodown.
sala:Yes, welcome hippodown.
Jerem:Welcome hippodown.
hippo:thanks, I think I'm going to like you as my new trainer
Jerem:What was that?
feral:He says he likes you.
jerem:thanks, now I'm sure you guys are hungry...
----Anonymous' house----
Anot(sleep talking):err NO! I R king of the trash can
the phone rings
anot: AGH! what was that?
he looks and sees the phone ringing and picks it up.
Fant:Anonymous, Jerem is loose.
anot: WHAAT!?
Fant:Yes, we need you to come here as fast as possible to ensure your saftey,bring your pokemon
Anot: Yess sir Fantasty
Anonymous hangs up
Anot:ok time to get ready.
---Jth's house---
Jth (looking in the mirror): Oh look at you you hansom guy, those chicks will be all over you.
the phone rings
Jth picks it up
Jth:hello?
Fant:Jerem is loose
Jth:OMFG WHAT THE HELL?
Fant:yes, we need you here as soon as possible, bring your pokemon
Jth:ok fantasty
Jth hangs up
Jth:hmm...now where are those pokeballs?
---outside Anonymous' house---
jerem:ok, lets see if anybody's home.
Jerem knocks on the door
Anonymous opens the door
Anon:AGH!!!
Anonymous slams the door shut.
Jerem:Hmm... I guess he's heard about us.
feral: Awww, I guess hes gotta die then eh?
Jerem: Hellz ya
Jerem smiles
Jerem knocks on the door again
No answer
Jerem:Salamence
sala:Got it
salamence breaks down the door with his tail.
they see Anonymous in a frenzy getting his pokeballs.
Jerem: Feraligatr, ICE BEAM
feral: FERAL!
Anon: AGH!!! Go Garchomp!
garchomp comes out and gets hit by ice beam
garchomp fainted
Anon: FUCK!
Jerem:Feraligatr, aqua tail!
Anon: Go Ryperior!
ryperior fainted
Anon: >_> all this trash can buisness has gone to my head
Jerem(angry):HIPPODOWN, EARTHQUAKE!
Anon: AGH!!!!
the house begins to fall apart
Jerem: Get him feraligatr! Hippodown, salamence, get out of here
hippo and salamence: OK!
they leave the house
feral:got him
jerem:lets go..
they begin to walk towards the door, but some of the wall comes crashing down over it.
Jerem:Crap, feraligatr, can you punch a hole in the wall?
feral:Yeah
feraligatr creates a hole in the wall, and walks throught it
Jerem: AGH FUCK!
some of the ceiling hit him on the head.
Jerem:I should make a note not to use earthquake in a house...
the house comes crashing down over Jerem
Feral: JEREM!
sala: This is not good.
Anon: hahahahahaahahaahahahahaah....OH FUCK MY HOUSE!
Feral: FERAAAAAL!!
Anon: AGH FUCK YOU FERALIGAYTER
FERAL: FEEEERRRAAAAL!
feraligatr slashes Anonymous in the face
Hippo:You fucker Anonymous, already lost my new trainer. DAMN YOU, I HATE YOU!
Anon: hippodown? IS THAT YOU?
hippo:yes Anonymous , it is me
Anon: OMG OMG OMG!!
Hippo: DAMN YOU, I still hate you
Anon: why?
hippo: because you never let me do anything, unlike Jerem who already lets me eat anything
hippodown charges at Anonymous, knocking him down
hippo: I HATE YOU!!
hippodown get Anonymous in his mouth, but doesn't eat him
feral: so he understands you?
hippodown nods
sala: we need to get Jerem out.
suddenly Jth walks by Anonymous' house
Jth: WHAT THE HELL Anonymous? OH FUCK ITS JEREM'S POKEMON, GO FLYGON!
Feral: FERAL!
feraligatr used ice punch
flygon fainted
Jth: crap, that was the only one I could find.
feraligatr grabs Jth
Jth: LET ME GO!
Feral: FERAL!!!
Anon: Jth, HELP ME!!
Jth sees Anonymous inside hippodowns mouth
jth:Dammit Anonymous, where's your pokemon?
Anon:Defeated
hippodown closes his mouth, so he cannot talk to Jth
Sala: Ill get started on this rubble...
salamence whacks the pile with his tail, and most of it flys off.
They see jerem lying on the ground
feral: JEREM!
feraligatr lets go of Jth and runs to jerem
Jth tries to run away, but salamence stop him
Jth: DAMMIT!
Feral: JEREM!!
feraligatr hits him with his tail to wake him up, but he doesn't stir
feral: JEREM!...
arceus: welcome back jerem
jerem:ugh, did I die?
arceus:no,but you're unconscious
jerem:so why am I here?
arceus:I'm here to tell you that you need to come here
jerem:???
arceus:TLF, their planning to destroy me
jerem: WHAT!?
arceus:yes, I need you to come and protect me
jerem: Can't you protect yourself?
arceus:no, my protection is here, but if they come i will need some help
jerem: so you need me to come to the peak of the moutain and protect you?
arceus:yes, now hurry...
Jerem:Ugh, I really hate doing that
jerem is surrounded by feraligatr, salamence, and hippodown
feraligatr sees him wake up,and hits him in the face with his tail
jerem:Oww, what was that for?
feral: stop scarring me like that
sala:yeah
salamence swoops jerem up with his tail and puts him on his back
hippodown nods
jerem:ugh, im really dizzy now.Hey, wheres that person?
hippodown opens his mouth to reveal a very wet Anonymous,and Jth
Jerem:Ha, nice. Two people, thats awesome hippodown
the two were surprised at seeing light, but realize thy can escape, but hippodown shuts his mouth before they climb out
jerem: ok hippodown,let them out
hippodown opens his mouth, feraligatr goes near him to get ready to grab them
the two climb out of the mouth, all wet
Jth: I hate you Jerem
Anon:me two
Jerem: that's great.feraligatr, grab them
feraligatr grabs them before they even move
jerem: hippodown, open your mouth up wide
hippodown does so
Jerem:feraligatr, put one of them right in front of his mouth
feraligatr puts Anonymous in front of his mouth,Anonymous is too scared to move
Anon: I hate you
Jerem: walk into his mouth
Anon: NO!
Jerem: DO IT!
Anon: NO!
jerem looks at hippodown
hippodown then extends his tongue around Anonymous' leg, and pulls him in his mouth
Anon: AGH!!! HELP ME JTH!!!
Jth: I CAN'T! I WILL NOT FORGET YOU!
hippodown gets Anonymous in his mouth, then swallows him
Jth: Anonymous...
Jerem: thank you hippodown, next up to die, JTH, salamence, you get him
sala: thank you
feraligatr brings Jth in fornt of salamence
Jth: GO DIE JEREM! YOUR FERALIGATR SUCKS! HIPPOPHAIL, SALAFUC---
salamence ate Jth before he was finished.
Jerem:Now, we need to go to mt.coronet...
feral:why?
Jerem:cuz...we just have to
feral:WHY!!!!
Jerem pulls the azure flute from his pocket
Jerem:thats why...
---TLF---
fant: I think its time we do this
fantasty is in an office talking to someone
person:why?
fant:well with jerem,we need to do this before he can do some REAL damage to us person:are you saying the loss of some of our best memembrs, including mods are not real damage?
fant:No, its just...you know what I mean
person: Very well than fantasty, go to mt. coronet
fant:thank you iggy.....FF_ROCKS, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!
FF comes running into to the room
FF:Y...Yes?
fant:I want you to be the first one to mt. coronet, you know get everything ready
FF:Y...Yes sir
FF_rocks runs out
iggy: You better hope you guys don't run into Jerem
fant: we can take him..
We see FF go into a room
FF: TEN-HUT!
hundreds of caterpies were scattered in the room. suddenly they all line up. Tey all have a little uniform on.FF can't help but to take a picture to treasure it forever.
FF:We're going to Mt. Coronet
all the caterpies start making little noises
FF: Yes, our mission is to go and prepare to kill arceus
even louder noises are heard.
FF:NOW COME ON CATERPIES!
FF begins walking out, and the caterpies follow...
Jerem: how are you holding up feraligatr?
jerem and feraligatr were walking up mt. coronet, and hippodown and salmence were inside their pokeballs, for Jerem did not want them weakend
feral:I'm doing fine, but I'm hungry
Jerem:well it should'nt be hard to find some...
A wild dratini lept up from a pons where they were by
Jerem:there you go
Feral:FERAL!!
feraligatr charged towards the dratini, and swallowed it like spagetti.
Feral:Ahh
Jerem: lets continue...Hey, what's that?
Jerem looked down the cliff, and could distantly see FF and his caterpies
Jerem:Hmm, TLF I assume, we need to hurry
feral:Yeah, hop on!
Jerem: gets on feraligatr
feral:lets go
feraligatr begins to run up the snowy moutain, and they quickly reach the spear pillar
feral: now what?
Jerem: I don't know, here let me let those two out.
Jerem lets salamence and hippo out
suddenly FF appears
FF:JEREM! YES! I SHALL DISPOSE OF YOU!!!
suddenly FF's watch goes off
Fant:remember, DO NOT KILL JEREM
FF: FUCK
Jerem: who do you think you are? Kill me? HA!
suddenly all of FF's caterpies emerge
FF: WHAT NOW!!!
Jerem:FERALIGATR, EARTHQUAKE!
Feral: FERAL!!!
all of FF's caterpies fly off the pillar to their death
FF: NO!!!!!NO!!YOU BITCH!
Jerem: I'm not in the mood for yelling, salamence, whack him off the mountain
FF: WHAT!? THERE NOT GOING TO EAT ME!?
Jerem:You are not worth of that death.
FF: WORTHY!!?!? WHAT!?
---Jerems childhood----
teacher:today I will tell you about death,now it WILL happen, but how is different
Jerem:teacher, is there considered an "unworthy" way to die?
teacher: I'm glad you asked Jerem. There is indeed.Ill start with the very higly respected death, it would be something like being killed by a pokemon after being bestted in battle.Next, would be being killed by a person.Lower, an indirect kill form a pokemon.And finally,the lowest issuicide.
Jerem: but what if you don't die like that?
Teacher:well than is considered "terrible" and has no ranking at all
Jerem: got it...
Jerem: Not worth of that death
FF: WHY!?!
Jerem: I said I'm not in the mood for screaming, now salamence...
salamence already headed for FF, and whacked him off the side
Jerem:Good bye
FF: AHHHHHHHH
FF:AHHHHHHH
FF is falling down but suddenly is saved by a butterfree, and is lowered to the base of the mountain, where fantasty is waiting
fant: you failed
FF: B...b..BUT!
fant: I don't care about your exuses, you failed
FF: So why did butterfree save me?
Fant:So I can do this...
fantasty stabs FF with a knife.
but the knife doesnt go trough FF's kevlar laced shirt.
FF: ZOMFGWTF!?!?!
Fant: umm... you were meant to die...
FF: oh...
Fant: um.. yea...
FF: so, ill be going now...
Fant: uh.. yea... sure, bye
FF: bye.
FF sends out his butterfree
FF: were going home butterfree...
FF jumps on butterfree's back.
FF: well, cya Fant...
FF flies up, but all is not good, for butterfee gos up to high, back to the spear pillar, where Jerem is.
Jerem sees this, looks at his salamence and tells him to go after FF
salamence flies to butterfree and FF and eats them, then flies back
Jerem:Good job salamence
Salamence half smiles
Suddenly someone appears from the cave entrance
Squicks: Jerem....I HATE YOU!!!
Jerem: There you guys go again with the hate and the yelling and who the hell are you anyway? AND WHAT THE HELL!? ARE YOU A BOY OR GIRL!?
Squicks: I'M....I WAS JTH'S BOYFRIEND, BUT WHO KILLED HIM!!!
Jerem smiles
Squicks: AND I'M NOT TELLING YOU IF I'M A BOY OR GIRL!
Jerem: Seriously, I'm tired of this damn yelling, if the next TLF member that comes here does, I'm not gonna even bother to talk to them. As for you, I don't like you so your going to die.
Squicks: I DON'T THINK SO!!!....
Jerem sighs and motions feraligatr to kill squicks
... I WILL DEFEAT YOU WITH MY POK---
Feraligatr slashed squicks in the face.
Feral: I want a change in the way I kill these guys, just eating them isn't enough.
Jerem: Whatever you please Feraligatr.
Squicks was too much in pain to even say a word, butthe look on Squicks face showed extrme pain.
Feraligatr then slashed Squicks' face again. Tons of red gushy blood began to pour out, and feraligatr licked it as it did.
Squicks finnaly could talk again.
Squicks: FUCK FUCK AHHH HELP ME FANTASTY, YOU SAID THIS WOULDN'T HURT! AGHHH!!!
Feraligatr began tearing off her limbs and ate them.
Squicks: AGHHH!!!! AGHH!!!!!! AGHH DEAR GOD FANTASTY HELP ME!!!!!! AGHH!! FUCK YOU JEREM!!! THIS IS NOT THE WAY I WANT TO DIE!!!! FUCK YOU!
Feraligatr slashed squicks in the face again, picked up the body, and ate it.
Feral: Delicious, but my claws are all bloody.
Feraligatr holds out his claws to reveal that they were covered in Squick's blood.
Jerem: Use a hydro pump in the air, and let the water clean them when it falls back down.
Feraligatr nodded and tried it. It got all of it off.
Jerem: Now without anymor interuptions I hope, I will see what we can do with the flute.
Jerem pulls the azure flute out.
He walks around untill he see's the flute marking.
Jerem: This should be it...
Jerem begins to play the flute, but nothing happens.
Suddenly fantasty walks to the pillar, along with many many TLF members. They held a long object in there hand.
Fant: It seems we finnaly meet face to face Jerem.
Jerem: Who are you?
Fant: I am fantasty, leader of TLF, or Libelldra for short.
Jerem: What do the other letters stand for?
Fant: The and forge. Now tell me, why have you not sent your demon pokemon after me yet?
Jerem: Ugh.. I don't know, I guess because your not screaming like everyone else has, but I will later.
Fant: You shall have no later, do you know what this item is?
Fantasty points to the object there members were carrying.
Jerem:Umm...No.
Jerem turns around and looks at feraligatr who shakes his head, then he looks at salamence who also shakes his head.But when he looks at hippowdon, he nods.
Hippo: Hippo! hipp hippo hip hippo.
Jerem: What does that mean?
Sala: He says its an item known as the abyssal chain, the second item to bring forth arceus.
Fant: Well Jerem, have your pokemon told you anything?
Jerem: Yes actually
Jerem looks at salamence
sala: I'm not speaking english remember?
Jerem had a puzzled look on his face
Jerem: I forgot the difference
Fant: Anyway, do you know what the abyssal chain does?
Jerem: No
Fant:It will bring forth palkia and dialga, and when those two are together, a time paradox will begin. then arceus will have to stop it. Thus when he comes, we will kill him so WE LIBELLDRA WILL RULE THE LAND!
Jerem: There we go with the yelling again. Anyway, you won't live long enough to to bring forth palkia and dialga.
Jerem then signalled his pokemon to go after fantasty....
Fant:Have you forgotton already Jerem?
Jerem: What?
As Jerem's pokemon try to attack fantasty, they are stopped by a force field
Fant: You must love technology no?
Jerem: Go die.
Fant: You're no longer in control here Jerem, GO CRESSELIA AND DARKRAI!
Cresselia and darkrai come out
Fant: CRESSELIA, THUNDER WAVE JEREM, DARKRAI DARK VOID HIS POKEMON
Jerem who has a headace from the yelling gets hit by the thunder wave, paralyzing him. His pokemon also get hit by dark void.
Fant: Now that you're out of the way, MEN BRING FORTH THE CHAIN!
The members bring the chain towards the middle of the pillar
Fantasty walks over to it and pulls out a pice of parchment and begins to recite the words
As he does, the chain begins to glow
Fant:... and by the power of the god, RELEASE TO ME DIALGA MASTER OF TIME AND PALIKA MASTER OF SPACE!
The chain straighten outs and floats in the air.Fantasty backs away. Soon two wormholes appear near the end of the chains. The chain extends into them and it pulls out dialga and palkia.
Fant: LET THE FUN BEGIN!
Palkia see's dilga, and begins to attack.
Palkia: PALLLLLLLLLL!!!!
Dialga: DIALLLLL!!
The two titans begin attacking.
There attacks cause feraligatr to wake up, but he pretends to stay asleep.
Fant: NOTHING CAN STOP ME!
Fantasty walks over to Jerem and kicks him, and the azure flute falls out of his pocket
Fant: What do we have here?
Fantasty examines the flute
Fant:Is this.... THIS IS THE AZURE FLUTE! OH HOLY DAYS IT'S THE AZURE FLUTE.
Dialga and palkia's attacks begin to cause the dimension to shake violently
Fant: THIS SHALL GO BY FASTER THAN EVER!
Fantasty begins to play the flute
While everyone's attention is away, Feraligatr gets up behind the group of Libelldrans, and he goes into one of there bags. The TLF member turns around and Feraligatr slashes him in the face, then eats him beforew he can scream. Feraligatr then looks in the bag and finds a full heal
Feral (thinking): I hope this works...
Feraligatr crawls over to Jerem and sprays him with the full heal.
Jerem: Uhh, thanks feraligatr
Suddenly darkrai turns around and sees the two togeter, and he fires a dark void at them
Feraligatr sees this and covers Jerem from the blast. Feraligatr then falls back asleep.
Jerem: Thank you feraligatr.
Fantasty finishes playing the flute
A stairway to the hall of origin appears.
One of dialgas attacks hit it, and the hall shakes causing arceus to appear.
Arceus: ARRRR!!!!!!!
Iggybot appears from the cave entrance, and walks over to fantasty.
Iggy: Arceus, you're powers is no match for me.
Fantasty looks at him and backs away.
Iggy, Arceus, palkia, and dialga all begin to glow.
A light begins to emmit from them all.
Arceus tries to break free from this, but can't
Arceus: AR AR AR!!!
Pal: PALLL!!
Iggy: I'LL SEE YOU ALL IN HELL!
A giant light beam comes crashing down in the middle of them, engulfing the four.
Fant: IT'S WORKING, WE HAVE SUCCEDED
Jerem: You will see him in hell.
Jerem snuck up right behind fantasty
fantasty turns around
Fant: What the hell?
Jerem: AHHHHHHH!!
Jerem take fantasty to the ground, and begins to punch him the the face.
The TLF members run over to them
Jerem: I WILL KILL YOU!
The TLF members try to pull Jerem off, but they can't
Darkrai see's this and uses a dark void at Jerem, and it hits him but not before Jerem striked the final blow to Fantasty.
The light clears up from where the four were, and nothing remained.
The biggest TLF member, zero took fantasty and jerem and began to bring them down the mountain
Zero: You have failed Jerem, and you shall rue this day forever...
--------- Several Hours Later ----------
Jerem is in a small solitary confidment chamber. He has a straight jacket on, and is shackled to the wall. There are no windows in the room, and only one door.
Zero walks in.
Zero:'Bout damn time you woke up.
Jerem: Hrrm, Where am I?
Zero: In the most secure cell in the Sinnoh region, or I should say Libelldran region now that we've taken over.
Jerem:What?
Zero: Yep, you failed, but you did kill fantasty and for that...
Zero slaps Jerem in the face
Jerem: Bitch.
Zero smiles
Zero: I should also tell you that Salamence and hippowdon are dead.
Jerem: WHAT!?
Zero: Yep, we killed them at the spear pillar, they were way to corrupt. Your feraligatr is alive though.
Jerem started to cry a little bit, but stopped.
Zero: So here's how the rest of your life will be:
You will get breakfeast.
Several hours later, you will get lunch.
An hour after that, you will visit your feraligatr without our intrusion for ONE MINUTE everyday.
Jerem: I'll be able to be with him for one minute a day, without any guards?
Zero: Yes well we prefer not to have you in a killer mood forever, BUT you will be seperated by a foot of the strongest glass we have.Anyway after that:
You will be given dinner several hours later
You will then go to bed and will start this all over again.
Zero: And right now, we will let you vist your feraligatr
Jerem grunted
Some guards came into th room and unhooked the wall chain.
They brought Jerem to a room, with glass in the middle. On the other side was Feraligatr, in worse condition than he.
Feraligatr was in a stright jacket, and his jaws were bound togheter so tightly, that he could barely open it to speak. He was also chained to the walls from several directions. Suddenly he looked up and saw Jerem.
Feral: I'm sorry Jerem...
Jerem: No, I am sorry. This is my fault, you were better off without me.
Feral: I was not, I hated my life before we met, I was in worse... well, similar conditons to this, but now I at least have a friend.
Jerem: Thanks. Did you hear what happened to salamence and hippowdon?
Feral: Yes...
Feraligatr looked down.
Jerem: We will find away to avenge them.
Feral: Thats doubtful, we have NO means of escape.
Jerem: But....we must find a way...
Guards entered the room
Guard: TIMES UP!
The two looked at each other, they knew they would have a long long long life ahead of them.
THE END OF PART 1
| QUOTE (hatdude @ Sep 18 2007, 06:55 PM) | ||
That is false the power of Blaziken cold never die |
tsk tsk tsk, that's wat u get for syaing feraligatOr
aslo a small update
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